Page 43 of Love is Grand
He nodded and scooted away, sensing my command of the situation.
Once Shell had squeezed some lime and lemon into her water, I said, “Cheers.”
When she returned the sentiment, my heart pounded like we were celebrating more than just this moment.
Shell
“Thank you,” I said to Cal, and I meant it. “I’ve never eaten here, and it was worthy of all the hype. Plus, that was really civilized,” I added, staring over my cup of herbal tea.
The ocean lapped in the distance, and the stars twinkled happily outside the open window next to our table. It was like a scene out of a movie—not my life.
Of course, Cal being Cal, he leaned back in his chair and winked, looking like the cat who ate the canary.
A past version of me would have retracted my statement, but he was trying. He’d brought me to the nicest place on the island—Eye of the Sea—and waited patiently while I enjoyed every course. I was sure he did this sort of thing all the time in Manhattan, but this was a first for me.
“That’s what I wanted,” he said, leaning forward with his elbows resting on the table. “Actually, what I want isn’t civilized at all.”
The last part came out more like a whisper, meant only for me, and I shivered.
“Shell.” My name was practically a growl in his throat, and my body pulsed with want.
Desire raged in my belly, and I told myself it was pregnancy hormones as I clenched my thighs, trying to tamp the coursing fire. Like a fool, I took a sip of my hot tea, thinking it would douse the heat burning inside me, but no such luck.
“Shell, I don’t know what to do. I’m going about this all wrong. I know that, but I also know I want you. So fucking bad. Nothing feels like when I’m with you. I’d sit in New York after seeing you, trying to recreate the feeling I felt when I was with you, and I couldn’t.”
I shook my head and was about to interrupt when he spoke again.
“No, don’t say anything. Don’t argue with me. I know I’m making unrealistic requests and demands—all of it too little, too late—but that’s me. I don’t know what I’m doing when it comes to building a relationship. I only understand taking them apart.”
Every cell in my body wanted to believe the forlorn divorce lawyer in front of me, but what was he asking?
When I breathed out his name, Cal stood.
“Let me call Adam and ask if they want to keep Weezie for the night, please?” he whispered while bending down toward me. “I need to feel you, touch you, be with you. Please.”
I had no idea when he came up with this idea.
“You can’t make those kinds of requests. Weezie is mine—she’s only stayed with my mom and dad. She doesn’t know Adam and Rylan like that.”
I’d long ago set my tea down, and now I stood from my chair, facing Cal. He tipped my chin up with his index finger.
“I know. It’s wrong of me, but I can’t help it. I’m going back to New York tomorrow afternoon, and I need you.” His fingers intertwined with mine.
“Another reason why we can’t—you’re leaving. I’m already having your baby. A piece of you is permanently intertwined in my life. Forever. I have to keep my own feelings out of it.”
We stood there next to our table in the back of the restaurant, overlooking the ocean, several hundred dollars charged to Caleb’s room, discussing our next move. It felt like a farce—I’d already slept with the man. Many times. I was knocked up with his kid, and now I wanted to play hard to get. Why?
“There’s no happily-ever-after for us,” I blurted.
He pulled me into him, my eyelashes brushing his white shirt. “There may be. I don’t know. I can come visit a lot, right?”
I didn’t respond. It felt like an impossible fairy tale.
“Let’s go to my villa for a while,” he said softly. “I can have a drink and you can have some sparkling water, and then Jack will take you home. You can pick Weezie up on your way home.”
Cal sounded defeated, and like the fool I was, I felt bad for him.
I took my phone out of my purse and noted the time—nine thirty—and the text from Rylan saying Weezie was asleep on her couch and Adam was carrying her to a guest room.