Page 74 of Borden 3
He wasn’t bothered by her question. He was more bothered by the distance she gave off. “Not knowing about him wouldn’t have kept me safe.”
She watched him for a few moments. “You didn’t even ask about him.”
Borden shrugged. “He’s boring.”
“Borden.”
“I know everything I need to know about him. For now.”
A waiter came around. They ordered. Emma was wary around Borden, her guard up, but she couldn’t hide the excitement that she would be having a seafood plate. Borden smirked, leaning back in his chair as he spun his zippo around.
She looked down at the first floor, a soft smile spreading. It was like she had it all figured out. Questions she’d harboured now answered. “Cheeky jerk,” she eventually whispered. “You went through all that just to hire me.”
There was a question in there somewhere. When Borden raised his brows, she said, “Why?”
“I told you why.” He looked her over. “I wanted you then, I want you now.”
She fidgeted nervously. “I guess…”
“Tell me.”
“You know a little more about me now. It doesn’t change how you feel?”
His hand paused around the zippo. “I only wish I’d known it sooner, Emma.”
Her face cracked. “It was messy, Borden.”
Tell me more, Emma. Open yourself. “I don’t care.”
“You might not have wanted me if you knew.”
“Why the hell not?”
“I was nothing like Kate.” Now she quickly corrected herself, wincing. “I only mean that you had lost her and…I would have thought you’d be looking for someone that was similar.”
“I wasn’t looking for anything,” he solemnly replied. “You came blazing into my life, don’t you remember?”
“I remember I found another alleyway that fucked with my life again.”
She said it as a joke, but Borden stilled, absorbing that information. Either she was referring to the incident he rescued her from, or it was to do with Theo. He watched her closely as her cheeks warmed. He was unravelling her and she knew it.
Fuck, he wanted her to give him this last piece of her.
“I took heroin,” he finally said, breaking through the tension. “I was a functioning addict. I could have easily been homeless, pushing a cart down the sidewalk during the day, collecting cans to take to the recycling tip for some coin. Don’t act like you were any worse than me, Emma. The only difference between you and me is that I put all that to rest.”
“How?” she asked, genuinely curious.
“You kill it.”
She stared at him long and hard. “Kill that part of your past?”
“Yeah.”
“I tried, and it worked, and then…and then I got buried alive.”
He gripped the zippo so hard, he felt the pain in his hand now. “I know, alleycat.”
The waiter arrived and served their orders. Borden stared at his ribs, his stomach churning. He wasn’t hungry. Emma stared at her plate, too, and then her eyes met his. They misted over. “Can you do something for me?”