Page 92 of Renegade Kings
Our forces had more than doubled overnight. None of the Endless had stayed behind. They didn’t even hesitate to join our ranks. Most of them had some kind of awareness of what had happened when they’d been taken over by whatever magic Arik had wielded against them. They remembered nothing of the process, but nearly everything of what they’d been made to do. It was the cold dead look in their eyes that was worrying me, though. Alard barely seemed like he was functioning. The only thing that got any kind of reaction out of him was when the fight was mentioned, and then his thirst for revenge kicked in.
I’d spent enough time in the human realm to worry about the trauma they’d been through. These people didn’t need to be walking into another fight, they needed time to deal with what they’d been through. Unfortunately, time was one thing we didn’t have. We weren’t in control of the schedule here. We were dancing to the tune of a madman and it was going to take everything we had to try to stay one step ahead of him.
All I could hope for was that taking matters into their own hands would be enough to sustain them for now. That this opportunity to fight back against the man who had taken everything from them would give them some kind of peace. At least until we reached the other side. Rebuilding would be just as hard as the battle, and I didn’t have the energy to worry about it right now. Not when all our attention needed to be on surviving.
“We have Damon secured in the hold of our flagship. He went fairly easily,” Rhidian told me. “He seems to be regaining some of his control. Fizzle is going to help him work with it while we sail.”
I took a deep breath of the salty air and nodded. A wave of melancholy swept over me as I realised this was probably the last moments like this that I’d have for a while.
“How much longer do you think it will take to load the boats?” I asked, turning back to my childhood friend.
Tank’s questions from last night lingered in my mind. Rhidian had fought the fight I hadn’t been ready for. He’d stepped into what should have been my role without question and he deserved far more than the hand life had dealt him.
“Not long. The supplies are aboard and being stowed away while the rest of the people are rowed across. It helps that we barely have enough supplies to get us through the journey,” Rhidian added wryly.
“We can restock after the attack from Arik’s supplies,” I told him confidently.
Rhidian shrugged and then trekked back across the sand to where our people were climbing into the next wave of rowing boats. “We won’t have to worry about it if we don’t survive,” he called out over his shoulder.
I should have chastised him for saying something like that in front of the people who were looking to us for leadership, but they were just as aware of the situation as we were. If we didn’t win this fight, none of us were walking away from it. Rations wouldn’t matter if we were dead or enslaved.
I watched Rhidian as he organised our people. They looked up to him. Not that they didn’t look up to me. I’d already noticed the looks I got from the people, and as uncomfortable as it made me feel, they looked at me as a queen. It was something I’d not had to deal with over in the human realm, and it would take some time to get used to it again. But Rhidian? They looked at him like he was one of them. He didn’t stand over them; he stood beside them and they accepted him for that. It was something I needed to learn from him because it was the type of leader I wanted to be as well.
“Nearly ready?” Dean asked from behind me.
He’d refused to leave the beach until I did, even if it meant Damon boarded the ship without him. Of course, he did. Dean was never far from my side, even when at first he appeared to be.
“We take the last boat,” I told him. “I want to make sure no one gets left behind.”
Most people would have felt the need to placate me by saying it would never happen. But not Dean. This was what I needed, so he’d do what he could to give it to me. It was as simple as that. It was how he supported everyone he cared about.
My magic almost purred in happiness at the thought of him. I felt it quiver along the bond towards him, and the soft growl he gave in response made me smile.
It had been strange to feel so weak after yesterday. I’d burned through magic before, but not to where I felt like I’d lost my connection. The power I’d touched yesterday had been different. It was so linked to the court itself, to Nymeria, that it had lit my pathways on fire. It had felt so familiar, and yet not quite right. Almost like it was a promise of something in the future I wasn’t quite ready for yet.
Was this how every fae felt when they ascended to the throne of one of the courts? I tried to cast my mind back and remember what my parents had been like, what the magic they’d wielded had felt like. But there was nothing there but confusion. Every time I tried to remember the feeling, it morphed into something else, and I was left with nothing but questions. The more I thought about it, the more I narrowed down the differences in how their magic had felt, and the more I realised it wasn’t the same. It wasn’t even a fraction of what I’d touched. If this power had been laying out amongst the trees all this time, did that mean I could have saved our people back then? Did it mean that my parents had never used the full extent of their power when the fight was at our door? Or did they not even have access to it in the first place?
“Hey.” Dean’s fingers pinched my chin as he tilted my head until our gazes met. “Where did your mind just go?”
“Back to the fight yesterday,” I answered honestly. “And back to my parents and the last time there was a fight for this court.”
Dean said nothing. His fingers gently brushed across my jaw line as he waited.
“Why didn’t they use it to protect our people last time?” I asked him, even though I knew he couldn’t possibly ever have the answer.
“I thought the magic you used yesterday was something new.”
“Yes, it’s growing into something new. But when I bonded to the court and my magic swept out into the land, it met with something that was already out there. Why didn’t they use it to save themselves?”
“You bonded with the Court?” Dean asked in confusion, not even attempting to answer the impossible question I’d actually asked.
“Yes.” I frowned in confusion. “You were there. You saw me receive the mark as I claimed the court.”
Dean nodded, and his fingers traced along the edge of the mark on my neck. I could see the concern on his face. “I just didn’t think of it in terms of bonding, I guess,” he added.
“It doesn’t make our bond any less important than it is…”
“I would never think that,” Dean cut in. “I know who you are to me, and I don’t need a bond to remind me how important that is. It’s just… if you have a link to this court and Arik’s army moves in and claims it, what’s that going to do to you?”