Page 52 of Bad Ball Hitter
“When I’m at home, in my hotel room.” He drops his voice. “In my shower, it’s always you.”
“Drake.” His name is a plea.
“Did you ever wonder why I never became serious with anyone?” He pauses, but I don’t respond. “That’s because no other woman measured up to you.”
I blink, shocked by his admission. “Me?” I let out a disbelieving laugh. “You’re blaming me for your player status?”
He pulls me closer, so close now that I can see the flecks of gold in his chocolate-brown eyes. “Yes,” he replies, his voice rough with emotion.
My heart skips a beat at his confirmation. It feels like a cyclone is whirling inside my chest, uprooting everything I thought I knew.
“What I remember is you moving on quickly after our split. I saw the photos online. Girls on your lap. You looked rather cozy.”
“I thought you were with Roy. Trust me. Had I known differently, I would have been on your doorstep in a heartbeat, Lila.” His thumb brushes my cheek, his touch tender and intimate. “Just the thought of you with him … it was unbearable. So I tried to forget. I tried to drink you away. Fuck you away.”
His honesty cuts me deep, his pain reflected in my heartache. The reality of our past mistakes hovers between us, thick and oppressive.
“You’re not making this easy,” I murmur, looking away as tears well up.
“Good,” he says with conviction, his fingers brushing against my cheek to wipe away a wayward tear. “Because easy isn’t what I want. I want complicated and messy. I want real. And you’re the realest thing I’ve ever known, Lila.”
I look up at him, blinking through the wet sheen in my eyes. His brown orbs hold my gaze with desperation and undeniable truth.
“I need you to understand something,” he continues, tugging me closer until we are just a breath apart. “It doesn’t matter how many times you push me away or how many mistakes we’ve made in the past. What matters is what we feel. What I feel toward you. Apparently, time and distance haven’t changed that.”
The convicted way he professes his feelings leaves a lump in my throat. It’s as if the walls around my heart crumble down bit by bit with each word he says.
“I can’t promise you anything right now, Drake,” I finally say, meeting his intense gaze with a soft one of my own.
He gives me a slight, understanding nod before leaning down. His mouth is so close to mine that I feel his breath. I bring my lips to his, but he shifts and kisses my forehead tenderly. My body stills as I fight the urge to back away. Did I read him wrong? I thought he wanted to kiss me.
“That’s okay,” he murmurs against my skin. “I can wait.”
He pulls away enough to look at me. His breathing heavy. “God, I want to kiss you right now.”
Okay, so I hadn’t misread the situation. Jutting my chin forward, I ask, “What’s stopping you?”
“When I kiss you, I want it to be just us. You deserve my full attention, and I promise to provide.” His grin turns wicked. “Besides, if the roles were reversed, and you were thinking about another guy, I’d be pissed.”
God save that man’s soul.
“Hmm, I heard in a song that as long as it’s only in your mind, it isn’t cheating.”
“Not sure I agree with that because I don’t want you thinking of another guy while my lips are on you, especially when I’m buried deep inside that tight little cunt of yours.”
Holy Mary, Mother of God.
I’m left breathless, my heart pounding like a drum as his words send a hot flush up my neck and into my cheeks.
“Drake,” I scold weakly, but he just chuckles, an indistinct sound that sends shivers down my spine.
“Come on, Hayes,” he murmurs, his eyes dark and intense as they hold my gaze. “Admit it. You want me just as much.”
I just shake my head. “I think we have some matters to take care of first,” I say through a groan.
“I’ll handle Miranda when we get back.” His tone is firm and resolute, his gaze unwavering. “But I don’t want to go into this with unfinished business between us.”
I practically melt at the words but find the strength to nod. “Me neither. But she’s going to kick me out. Maybe we should wait until after I get the loan secured.”