Page 27 of Exile
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
SERENA
Monday afternoon brings a warm front to the area that melts the snow that had been preventing us from leaving the cabin. While I’m happy to finally go home, a big piece of me is sad about leaving. This cabin has felt like a sanctuary for the last three days, sheltering me from all of the stress and responsibilities of life. Dom has doted on me, made love to me, used me, and pleasured me to the point that I’m not even sure I remember how to walk. After his only condom broke, I made him pull out every other time we made love. I’m still not feeling great about that particular backup method, so I plan on asking him to stop by the pharmacy on the way home so I can pick up some Plan B.
My good intentions to pick up emergency contraceptives go up in flames when my phone rings as we get into town. I see Kai’s name on my screen, and I hesitate to answer his call, not wanting to irritate Dom by talking to Kai. The call rings out and goes to my voicemail. Instead of leaving a message like I assume he would, Kai must decide to call right back, because my phone immediately starts ringing again. This time I do answer it, a sick feeling of dread settling in my stomach. He wouldn’t call like this if it wasn’t an emergency.
“Hey, what’s going on? Is Mom okay? What’s wrong?” My words come out in a breathless rush, panic already making my throat tight.
“Your mom’s fine, ReRe. Don’t freak out. Mrs. G slipped on some ice. We think she might’ve broken her arm. The ambulance just took her to BF General, but I wanted to let you know I’m here with your mom.” My heart sinks at hearing the news about Mrs. G.
“Shit, is she okay?”
“She was flirting with the paramedics who came to help her, if that tells you anything. Cussin’ up a storm too, saying it hurt like ‘a sonofabitch’ and complaining about having to miss bridge club tonight.” I can hear the smile in Kai’s voice, and I can’t stop one from forming on my lips to mirror his.
“Sounds like she’s just fine then. Good. Look, we just got into town; we will be home soon. Do you mind staying with Mom until I get home?”
“Re, you don’t even have to ask. I’ll be right here until you get back. Your mom is already insisting on making muffins for Mrs. G as a get well soon present.”
“You’re going to bake muffins?” I raise an eyebrow and let the incredulity seep into my voice.
“Oh, hell no. Your mom is going to bake, and I’m going to lick the batter bowl and keep her company.” I laugh, knowing Kai is one hundred percent telling the truth.
“Alright, keep her company. We will be there soon.”
When I hang up, I look over at Dominick and see his eyes locked on the road, expression stormy. He doesn’t look my way when he bites out, “Why was Kai calling you?”
A little hurt and a lot bewildered by his tone, I immediately find myself on the defensive. “He was calling to let me know Mrs. G slipped on some ice. She’s been taken to the hospital, and he is staying with Mom until I get home.” Dom doesn’t respond, just jerks a nod, keeping his eyes focused on the road.
Instead of starting another argument, I turn my focus to my phone and start composing a text to Marie to let her know I won’t be at work tomorrow. I’ve got to make a plan for what to do about Mom while I work and go to class. It’s not like she can’t be alone, but her memory lapses can be unpredictable, and the idea of her forgetting and going out into the world without someone there with her sends my mind into a panic spiral.
It happened a few times when she first got home after the accident, when it was just the two of us trying to learn how to live with our new normal. One day she went to the mall while I was at school and forgot where she parked the car and couldn’t get back home.
Another time she forgot Dad had died in the accident and went to his office to surprise him with lunch. When his coworkers called me to come get her, she was inconsolable with grief in the middle of his office. That was probably the second worst day of my life. Watching my mom relive the agony of losing Dad all over again gutted me. There have been other times when the grief came back, fresh and raw, but that day in the office was just like being in the hospital when she finally woke up and I had to tell her the news. I find myself lost in the haze of memories from those early days when I had to break the news to my own mother that her husband, her life partner of twenty years and the father of her only child, had died.
The steady beep of the heart monitor is like a metronome, but instead of keeping time for a beautiful piece of music, I only hear the symphony of hospital noises. The soft whoosh of air from the oxygen cannula, the low murmur of chatter from nurses at their stations, occasional overhead pages for stroke alerts or incoming traumas, the mechanical hum of the portable x-ray machine roaming the hallways.
I’ve been sitting by this hospital bed for three weeks now, for as long as they allow me to stay, sometimes well past visiting hours. I’ve hardly been to class, but thanks to my stellar grades, my teachers are giving me a pass on the last few weeks of school. Mrs. G, Kai and his parents have all stopped by regularly, checking on me and Mom, bringing me food and books to read, but I have never felt more alone in my life. All I want is for my mom to wake up and a hug from my dad. One of those things I know I will never get to have, and the other seems less likely with each passing day.
Visiting hours are almost over, and I am resigning myself to leaving this godforsaken hospital again with no progress from Mom, when I feel a light squeeze on the hand I am using to hold Mom’s with. My heart immediately begins to race when I see her fingers twitch, and I feel another light squeeze.
“Mom? Can you hear me?” My voice is an excited whisper, hope bubbling in my chest at the possibility that she is here with me. She doesn’t say anything, but she gives my hand another squeeze. My vision goes blurry as tears silently pool in my eyes.
“Mom, it’s Serena. I’m right here. I’m here, Mom. Please, please, wake up. I need you.” My words are a plea. A prayer. I keep repeating myself, willing her to open her eyes and fully wake up. I’ve never needed anything more than for my mom to open her eyes and look at me so that I know she is okay.
When she does, and her eyes meet mine for the first time since the day of the accident, I break down. The floodgates open, and the tears come pouring out in a tsunami of loss, grief, sadness and anger. But also, there are tears of relief and hope and happiness that I still have her. That I didn’t lose her too.
A firm hand on my leg brings me back to the present, and I realize with a start that we are now parked in my driveway, and I’m crying.
“Hey, Kitten, what’s wrong? Talk to me.” Dom turns my face so I’m looking at him, and he wipes away the tears sliding down my cheek with the pad of his thumb. “Why are you crying, baby?”
“I-I was…just thinking about how it was in the beginning. After the accident and how hard it was. I’m okay…I’m just…worried about how I’m going to take care of Mom without Mrs. G’s help. I can’t leave her alone, Dom. I can’t…” Dom surprises me by unbuckling my seatbelt and pulling me into an embrace. He kisses the top of my head while rubbing soothing circles on my back.
“Don’t worry, Kitten. You’re not doing this alone anymore. I’ll take care of it. You’ve got nothing to worry about. We will figure it out together, and I will make sure you, and your mom, are taken care of. You’re mine now. My responsibility.” I nod, my head resting against his chest, his strong heartbeat calming the wave of panic that had been threatening to take over. Knowing Dominick is here, ready to help in whatever way possible, gives me the strength I need to get out of the car and face this new obstacle in my life.
As we walk up the steps to the front porch, my phone starts buzzing in my hand with an incoming call from Marge. Marie must have let her know what’s going on. “Hey, I need to take this. I’ll be right in.” I tilt my head towards the door, inviting Dom in while I hang back to talk to Marge.
“Hey, Marge, I guess Marie told you what happened?”