Page 24 of His to Worship
“What do you mean?”
Renata hesitates before speaking, her voice cautious. “It’s just...Kuvier seems fixated on you, and only you. He wants to help me because I’m with you, but I don’t think he’s really interested in the well-being of anyone but you.”
“I don’t think that’s true.”
“Oh, it totally is, but it’s fine. It works out for us, and besides, it couldn’t be me anyway.” She shrugs as if her words just make perfect sense.
“Why couldn’t it be?” I keep my voice light and questioning, trying to avoid the hurt I feel building as the weight of judgment settles on my skin.
Renata scoffs. “Because, I have no ‘feminine wiles.’ I’m not like you, Sedona. I can’t flirt with someone like you did with Kuvier and just wrap them around my finger. It seems like that’s what Enikk is looking for from me, so I need to be more cautious about him than Kuvier.”
Her words hit me like a punch to the gut, and I feel a surge of hurt and frustration rise within me. Is that really how she sees me? As someone who would use her charms to manipulate others? I want to lash out, to defend myself, but I bite back the words, forcing a tight smile instead.
“Ah, I get it.”
I leave it at that and let silence fall over us as the sting of Renata’s words lingers. It’s a stark reminder that I have more to contend with here than just surviving. When the others wake up, that’s six more people to judge me for every choice I’ve made since I crashed and woke up.
I can’t help but wonder if maybe I deserve the judgment. I could have woken them all up as soon as I saw Kuvier was safe. Instead, I flirted and enjoyed his attention, and if I’m honest, I would have kept doing that longer if Renata’s pod hadn’t turned yellow. Not for the first time, I wish that somebody else had woken up first. If Renata had been up by herself, we’d be way further along, and at least I’d have no one judging me for being cared for by an alien and liking it.
FIFTEEN
- kuvier -
My mind is busy as the dusk light overtakes the white valley. The snow flurries about outside Sedona’s cave as my thoughts swirl in the recesses of my mind. Enikk’s appearance has thrown off all of my plans. In fact, the appearance of both Enikk and my female’s companion have forced me to throw away all of the intentions I had crafted for Sedona.
I had counted on our being alone to properly court her and mate her. How am I to claim her body when you can hear and see everything in this small space? How am I to make her my own when we do not even have the time in the day to learn each other’s words any longer? Still we cannot truly communicate past the most basic of needs.
I frown as I consider the setbacks I must now face. If I do not make moves soon, I will be at risk of ruining everything. Two hunters can only disappear for so long before they will send someone to look for us. The mountains are the first place they will turn to, and the valley will come soon after. I cannot risk being discovered before Sedona bears my mark.
Pondering this, I sit by the tended fire with vigilant eyes that alternate scanning the frozen scene before me and glancing back at Sedona’s sleeping form. Inside the shipping crate, Sedona sleeps peacefully next to the stone eggs, huddling under the warmth of my furs. Her breaths and heart mix together in one steady and rhythmic beat. I find myself wishing that I was under the furs, warming my mate. I would like nothing more than to feel the soft curve of her body pressed against me in sleep, and yet I cannot bring myself to move from this spot.
In this place next to the fire, I sit between Enikk and my greatest gift and I cannot move an inch. The thought of Enikk stealing her away, though irrational, gnaws at my mind. Enikk has shown no particular interest in Sedona, focusing his attention more on the other female. Yet, the fear persists.
As if called by my thoughts, Enikk sits up from his place under the awning. He still fears the inside of the cave and does not venture far inside. This works perfectly, as I do not believe he has not yet figured out that the strange stone eggs hold additional females.
Enikk is not a male of bad intentions, I know this, but any male could become different in the face of females; our senses have the habit of betraying us when we see a beautiful face. If one of these girls is his mate, will he run screaming to the tribe of his great news? I cannot risk it. There is too much at stake.
“Kuvier,” Enikk begins, his voice low and measured, “I see you are troubled. What concerns you so deeply that you forsake sleep?”
I consider him, my expression guarded. “I have much to protect, Enikk. I cannot afford to be careless.”
He voices my unspoken fears. “You worry about your female.”
I resist the urge to snarl at the mention of her in his mouth. It is the mate bond, I know. It is unfulfilled, and with every moment it remains such, I grow more restless, more possessive. Whatever the Elders described is nothing compared to what the bond is truly like. It is terrifying and captivating all at once.
“I worry about a great many things that are none of your concern.” I am short with my words, but my patience is wearing thin. Enikk should not even be here; he forced his way in, and that is becoming more than a simple inconvenience.
“What are your plans with Sedona and Renata?” he asks, ever unphased by my surliness. “When do you intend to return to the clan and the atan to tell them of these females?”
The question lingers in the cold air. My eyes narrow and my tail begins to thrash against the stone ground with hollow thuds.
“I will return when I choose,” I reply firmly. “You are free to go at any time, Enikk. If you remember to keep your silence.”
“I do not wish to go anywhere, clansman.” His response is measured and calm.
“And your purpose with Sedona?” The question is heavy with my own paranoia. I am not sure that any answer will be enough to settle me, but I would like to hear from him directly.
Enikk’s expression is open and readable. “I have no intentions towards Sedona.”