Page 122 of Vicious Knight
“Yes.”
Thorne is the first person to truly notice that aspect of my music. He once said that it sounded like death. There’s a reason for that. The answer lies with the nine-year-old girl I was who saw the hallways littered with the bodies of the people she once knew. Losing my father—even though he’s still alive—felt like death. So did losing who I used to be.
“Why is it so dark?” he asks, keeping his gaze on me.
“My…past.”
He nods, understanding. “Would you ever consider creating something lighter?”
“Maybe. There’s a lot of lightness here. Thank you for this trip. It meant a lot to me.”
“You’re welcome. I’m sure you had a better time with me than Aiden.”
“Of course. Also I wouldn’t have been hanging out with Aiden on the trip. Isabelle and Mackenzie were there. So were Sawyer and Eilish.”
“Believe me that asshole would have found a way to hang out with you. Just remember what I said about him.”
“I remember.”
“I’m trying to get you a different tutor.”
I blink at him several times. “That’s not necessary.”
“Yes, it fucking well is.”
“We’re always in the library or around people.”
“I would feel better if he weren't anywhere near you.”
There’s that protectiveness again. It makes me crazy, but he also makes me feel safe.
His expression turns more pensive and I think of what he told me weeks ago about his uncle and Aiden. I haven’t asked about that since because the time wasn’t right, but I’ve wanted to. Now that we’re talking about it, I feel I have an opening.
“How are things with your uncle and Aiden?”
Thorne tilts his head and chews briefly on the inside of his lip before he straightens again.
“Absolute shit. I’ll be lucky to get my legacy after graduation. Aiden has basically replaced me.”
“Can your uncle do that?”
He sighs with the frustration of a man who's thought of every idea and failed. “Yes, he can.”
“Why would he do that to you? That makes no sense.”
“Because he can. Because… he thinks I’m just like my father, and that means I’ll be a threat to him.”
This is the most Thorne has ever said to me about himself and the things that worry him. He doesn’t talk about his father either, or his family for that matter. Like me when I talk about my father, I know he’s being mindful of my feelings.
“Why would your uncle think that?”
“He’s right. A man like my uncle has secrets he wants to keep close to his heart. I have a penchant for finding out things like that. I take after my father in every way. That makes me as dangerous to my uncle as he considered my father to be.” He pauses for a moment. “Aiden can’t do what I can do. He has skill, but I’m something else. He’ll also be the mindless automaton my uncle wants him to be. Aiden and his family want to climb the ladder of power so he’ll do whatever he’s told. I won’t.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. You know what I’m sorry about?”
“What?”