Page 20 of Hotwife

“What?” I narrowed my eyes at him, extending a piece of toast towards his mouth.

He took a big bite. “I may have volunteered you to host a dinner gathering for me and my colleagues.”

Grabbing a throw pillow, I whacked him on the shoulder. “Ced, you what? Oh holy hell, you know I suck at planning parties.”

Giving a shrug with his hands out in surrender, his head shook. “I know, I know. It’s just that most of the men aren’t exactly on…” he searched for the word, “Party asking terms with their wives. But my wife is just so lovely and sweet,” he added, smiling his dashingly handsome smile.

I rolled my eyes. “Now I know you’re lying. Eva could throw a party in her sleep. She probably does. I bet Dr. Gregory doesn’t even notice.”

Cedric huffed. “There’s a lot that man doesn’t notice, that’s for sure. But I get the impression the clock is ticking on that marriage.” Then suddenly, his palm took mine into his and I almost gasped at the contact. His hands were warm and tender. I gripped him back and put down my mug. “I’d like to try to move along the politics of my promotion. Henry’s tired. He’s been eyeing retirement for a decade now. It’s my time to take over and he’s dragging his feet. He mentioned getting some people together for a meal and before I knew it, I was spouting off about how much you’d love to host.” Still returning my hold, his other hand ran through his hair. “Forgive me?”

Taking my tray, I sat it on the floor and turned to my husband, still carefully clutching the duvet to my collar. “Of course, I’ll do it. Anything for you. Anything to get you some normalcy again.”

“Get us some normalcy again,” he corrected and my heart swelled. The love I had for this man was immense. He was always thinking of me. Of us. From the way he soft scrambled my eggs to wearing ear-buds to not risk waking me in the morning as he listened to NPR.

Then I couldn’t help myself any longer. His smile, his tousled hair, the way his body relaxed next to mine.

Dropping the blanket, I rose onto my knees and put one over, straddling him. His previously slack pose hardened. Wrapping my hands gently around his neck, I rested my forehead on his.

“I miss you,” I whispered.

Don’t reject me. Don’t push me away.

His hands floated to my soft hips and rested on them lightly. My shorts had ridden up, exposing a whole lot of ass to go along with my lack of shirt.

“I miss you too, Dot,” he breathed.

Yes, yes, yes.

My lips brushed his softly, waiting. After a moment, his kiss answered mine. His lips were as sensual and warm as they were when we shared our first kiss. It happened under the stars next to that rusty Oldsmobile he fixed up for me. I could have floated away on his kiss then and now all the same.

My center fluttered with heat. The feel of him under me had me lightly bucking my hips, desperate for contact. He hadn’t pulled away or broken touch. This could work. It could finally happen.

My hand glided down from his neck to his tight abs, centering on the middle of his silky grey basketball shorts. I loved those shorts on guys. They revealed everything and were so soft and sexy to grind against. Give me a hard cock behind those loose shorts any day. But my hand came up empty.

Giving him a quick glance, I pulled back. “I’d love to suck on you,” I whispered. That would get him hard, surely?

Cedric swallowed, jaw tensing.

“Not today, sweetheart.”

My heart sank into the floor. Shoving off of him, I suddenly felt naked. I was half naked, but now I felt it, and not in a sexy way.

“Dot,” Cedric said in a pained tone. “Please don’t be that way. We’ve talked about this.”

“That doesn’t make it any better that my own husband isn’t attracted to me anymore,” I spat, storming into my closet and pulling out a green top and jeans. “You know most women are begging their husband’s for a break in the bedroom. I’m begging mine just to look at me.”

Cedric got up and walked to the closet doorway. “You know it’s not that I’m not attracted to you. I am. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, Dotty.” He ran a hand through his hair again and looked at the ceiling. “We’ve been over this. It’s why we decided to… you know.”

“Say it, Cedric.” I was spewing venom now, but I didn’t care. Over a year of reenacting this very scene. Of me being vulnerable, naked, wanting, and being ultimately told no. “Say that you’ve outsourced fucking your wife.”

“You agreed to this arrangement, Dot. It’s not what I want, but what choice do I have? If it’s between that or losing you, I’ll do whatever I have to. Sex isn’t on the table for me right now.”

I pulled on my jeans and shirt, not bothering with underwear or a bra. “You think letting other men fuck me fixes this? You think I just want to get off? I can get off fine with my vibrator, thanks. I want you.”

“I can’t give you that right now, Dot. Not after…” He swallowed again, looking down at me with those sad, tired eyes.

“Cedric,” I took a step closer, “you did the best you could.”