Page 10 of Hawk
When I step out front, I scan the area for Ivy’s car then walk over to the driver’s side and tell her to follow me.
I don’t start the bike in front of the clubhouse so as not to alert anyone of my sudden departure. I push the bike down the road and when I feel like I’m far enough to start it without causing a ruckus, I hop on and begin the drive to my house.
I have a daughter.
And I have questions – all of which I’m going to get answers to as soon as I get to my place.
We pull up in the yard. I hop off the bike and unlock the front door, then stand there holding it while Ivy takes Lilly out of the car without the car seat. She finally comes up the steps, into the living room and sits on the sofa.
I close the door gently. I want to slam the crap out of it, but I don’t want to irritate Lilly who’s currently staring at me with her big brown eyes, same color as mine.
I have a freakin’ daughter.
I look at Ivy and say through gritted teeth, “Start talking.”
“Um…I don’t know where to begin.”
“How about the part about you being pregnant with my child and not telling me? Start there!” I yell, letting my anger get the best of me.
Lilly’s little hands grip and squeeze onto her mother’s blouse. I’m scaring her. That’s not what I want to do, but my emotions are all over the place. I have a daughter and she’s beautiful and perfect. Am I wrong for being pissed at her mom right now?
“You should’ve told me. The whole time I was sitting in a cell rotting away—”
“Rotting away?” she intercepts. “Stop being dramatic.”
“Don’t tell me what I’m being when I was the one locked up. I had all kinds of crazy thoughts running through my mind. Knowing I had a daughter waiting for me would’ve been motivation for me—a push to do better and want to do better.”
“I wanted to tell you, Gideon, but I didn’t want to go through you denying that she was yours and all of that.”
“Denying her? Her? How on earth can I deny her, Ivy?”
I stand up and pace the room, searching for my own answers because I’m too angry to ask her more questions. I step outside again, take a deep breath, and when I return, I notice she has lowered Lilly to the floor. Lilly’s sitting on her tush, staring up at me like the stranger I am to her.
“When did you find out you were pregnant?”
“About a month after you got locked up.”
“And when did you start seeing someone else?”
“A few months after Lilly was born.”
“That’s who you need help from, right? You’re running from him?”
“Yes. Look—I know you hate me. I wouldn’t have come to you unless it was absolutely necessary. I have nowhere else to go.”
“What has he done to you?”
“Um…he yells at me and Lilly. He’s hit me. Kicked me. Punched me.”
I shake my head, already deciding the best way to handle this. Nobody lays a hand on my ol’ lady. It doesn’t matter if we’re together or not. She’s still my property – still has my last name – and it’s murder for anyone who lays a hand on my seed.
“So, that’s the prince charming you thought was better than me? A man who abuses you? I’ve never laid a hand on you, Ivy.”
“I know. I—”
“And this man has been abusing you to the point that you need to hide from him?”
She sighs. “I can’t go to my apartment. He will sit in the parking lot until I get home, and that’s after I broke it off with him. He says there’s no end to us—that I’m his forever. Besides going to get a restraining order, I don’t know what else to do.”