Page 90 of Broken Romeo
Fuck. It was too much. The thoughts. The memory of her taste. The prospect of what could have been if I’d just let her stay the night with me. I blinked away from the eye contact and coughed into my fist.
“Stop!” Keith shouted and scrubbed his hands down his face. “That was… closer.”
He was being generous. With a glance at his watch, he waved to the crowd of our classmates standing on the stage, bored. “The rest of you take your seats. Kate, Holden, stay where you are.”
Professor McCay stood, setting her binder on the seat behind her. “Keith, give me a moment with them?”
Keith nodded, and as they walked past each other, I saw a subtle flex to her index finger as she brushed it suggestively along the back of his knuckle. Kate caught my eye, her brows twitching in a way that told me she saw it too.
McCay waved us both into center stage. Gritting my teeth, I shuffled in as Kate did the same, each of us walking so slowly, you would have thought we were making our way to the gallows.
“Okay,” Professor McCay said, crossing her arms and glaring at us. Even though she was barely talking above a whisper, her voice was stern. “What’s going on with you two? Your chemistry in class last week was off the charts and now it’s like you’re barely even looking at each other.”
She glanced between us, ping-ponging her gaze back and forth.
I couldn’t exactly answer for Kate, but I’d spent the last 48 hours fucking my hand with her panties wrapped around my dick.
And now I was supposed to lovingly look into her eyes and pretend I wasn’t this lying pervert?
Finally, I broke the silence, unable to take it for another second. “I think you should cast someone else as Romeo. I’m not an actor… that’s pretty obvious. And a lot of people in the class would kill to have this on their resume.”
McCay looked to Kate. “Do you agree with his assessment?”
Kate swallowed hard, eyes panicked as they flitted from the professor’s to mine. “It’s not my place to agree or disagree.”
“Not true,” McCay stated. “You’re the other lead in this part. Every choice Holden makes during this show affects you. And therefore, choices should be made with each other in consideration. So, what do you think? Should I recast Holden?”
Yes… just say yes, Kate. I glared at her, willing her to agree with me. This would fix everything. It would be so much easier if I could just be Tybalt, or rather “Tyler” in this show, her cousin. Her cousin who never has to touch her or kiss her or simulate sex with her. Because, yes, fuck me, there’s a sex scene.
Looking directly at me, Kate’s eyes narrowed as she said, “No. Holden’s audition was the best, even if he doesn’t see that.”
McCay’s brows arched higher, indicating that she was surprised by Kate’s answer. Well, step in line McCay, because I was stunned.
The professor slowly looked to me. “But Keith and I can’t have a broken Romeo who holds back. It’s not fair to Keith and his final graduate thesis. It’s not fair to the other classmates who also work hard in this show. And it’s not fair to Kate.”
I threw my hands up. “What do you want from me? I’m not an actor. You knew that when you gave me the part. This isn’t going to be easy for any of us.”
McCay’s expression softened. “You’re right, Mr. Dorsey. Remember when we read Stella Adler’s book in class the other day? She talked about using ‘as if’ scenarios to help actors such as Marlon Brando get into character.”
Tucking my script under my arm, and my hands in my pockets, I nodded.
“Well,” McCay continued, “use that now. Be Remy. But be Remy as if you were at a party and a gorgeous girl walked by you. What would you do… as that character?”
My throat went dry. “I’d run in the opposite direction, that’s what.”
It didn’t mean I was celibate, but I sure as fuck never leaned into those intense feelings. Not since my freshman year. I ran from them, instead choosing to engage with the girls I felt mostly nothing for. Get my kicks. Get my dick wet. And get out with neither of us getting crushed.
I’d seen what getting crushed by the weight of a politician’s son can do to a woman. I wasn’t going to let that happen again.
“Okay…” Professor McCay said carefully, before waving Keith back over to the three of us. “That sounds like what you, Holden, would do. But what would you do as Remy?”
I dragged a shallow breath in before answering. “I would run in the opposite direction,” I reiterated. “Remy just had his heart broken by Rosalyn. Why the fuck would he jump from that heartbreak into another?”
“Why does anyone?” Kate said.
Gooseflesh broke out along my skin at the sound of her voice. What the hell was it about her that affected me so viscerally?
“She makes a good point,” Professor McCay said. “Why do you think Remy falls so hard, so quickly, after such a bad breakup?”