Page 40 of Forbidden Romeo

CHAPTER 16

“What do you think?” Holden asks, pointing at a man walking through the station with a long thin hard case strapped to his back. “Trombone player?”

I examine the man through narrowed eyes as I take a lick of the buttercream off my second cupcake.

Then, shaking my head, I say, “Nuh-uh. He’s a larper. On his way home to Long Island after a meet up in Central Park.”

“A larper?”

“Yeah… live action role playing. That case holds his replica long sword.”

Holden blinks down at me and shoves the remainder of his cupcake into his mouth with a shake of his head. “Who even are you?” he teases.

I drop my head to his shoulder and cross my legs, ignoring the way the hard bench is making my butt go numb.

“Tonight has been incredible… thank you.”

I feel the press of his lips to my temple. “Thank you.”

Unfortunately, there’s nothing left to talk about. Except it.

I swallow as the looming darkness of the discussion we’ve yet to have shrouds us.

“So…” Holden says, nearly reading my thoughts.

“So…” I sigh and sit up straight, turning to face him. “Why don’t I start?” He nods. “I thought you hadn’t been able to find Megan, so I did some investigating and found her address, thinking I was helping. I wasn’t spying on you or trying to catch you in some sort of lie. I was simply on my way over to her place when I spotted the three of you together?—”

Holden winces. “Coming out of the movies?”

I gape at him. “No, at the playground. Jesus Holden, just how many dates have you had with them?”

“Not dates,” he corrects me, sharply. Then after a pause, he says, “And… Three. Once at the playground. Once to a movie. And another for ice cream.”

I’m not sure why this stings so much, but it does. It feels like a bee landed on my heart and plunged its little needle-like stinger right into my aorta.

“Why wouldn’t you tell me you were in contact with them?”

“Why didn’t you tell me you saw us together?”

I pick at the paper wrapper around the base of my cupcake, avoiding his intense whiskey hued gaze. “Because I wanted you to tell me. I wanted you to trust me, to confide in me. But … you never did.”

He exhales and takes a swig from his water bottle. “I wanted to try to figure things out in my own head before talking to you,” he says quietly. “This whole situation is so fucked up and I’m not really sure what to do. I thought maybe if I met him, I could tell if he was my son. Like some sort of cosmic father-son bond would alert me to the truth. Spoiler alert, it didn’t. Megan doesn’t know whose he is. But apparently, my Dad knew when she got pregnant and paid her family a huge sum to go away.”

Erik Fucking Dorsey. The gift that keeps on giving. I reach out and take Holden’s hand, giving him a squeeze. “We’ll deal with your dad later, okay? Right now, let’s focus on you and Jamie and Megan.”

Holden’s smile flickers a little brighter at the mention of Jamie. “He’s a cool kid. He’s smart and active and sweet. He’s a lot of things I wasn’t at that age. I think you’re going to love him.”

“I can’t wait to meet him.” My heart does a little skip at the statement that I’m going to be included. It’s the first time Holden’s even mentioned me alongside the situation. I take another breath to calm myself; because it’s not about me. “So what’s next? Do you want a paternity test?”

Holden blinks, coming slowly out of the sweet fog thinking about Jamie. “You’re really okay with all this? Jamie and Megan?”

I shrug and hug his arm. “I love you,” I whisper. “And whether Jamie is your brother or your son, he’s a part of our lives now forever. Megan, too. So it doesn’t matter if I’m okay with it. This is just the way life is.”

Holden inhales sharply. “You love me?” he whispers.

Shit.

I didn’t exactly mean for it to come out that way.