Page 20 of The Air I Breathe

"I know." I laugh. "But if I can keep from spilling my guts to you, then that means I might be able hold strong."

"You do know what you're getting into with her, right?" Bret asks. "There will be cameras everywhere. There will be people criticizing everything you do. If we lose, we'll be losing because she's a distraction. If we win, we'll be winning because she's a distraction to the other team. Will you be able to ignore it when players start talking shit to you out on the field? It's a lot to deal with. When CeCe was pregnant with Jovi? Guys would say shit all the time when they sacked me—mostly about how they hoped I'd be hurt so bad that I wouldn't be able to take care of my kid. They're going to say worse to you. We both know it."

I inhale deeply, l understand what he's trying to say, and for the moment I take my attitude down. "No, I get it. I appreciate you, and I appreciate that you're always trying to look out for me. You've done it since we were kids. You know I almost didn't make it here, and you know that if it weren't for you, I wouldn't be playing ball."

He rolls his eyes, tilting his head back. "You made a stupid mistake eating an edible gummy."

"It was more than one," I remind him, smirking. "It was way more than it should've been, but damn they were good. I just had no idea they were laced with anything. How was I to know that was going to be the next big thing? I should’ve fucking invested, think of where I’d be now."

"Look, it was college, and if you hadn't been an athlete it wouldn't have been a big deal. We both know that. It isn't like you were some sort of vagrant who was out there snorting coke and using it to help you run faster. You ate fucking gummies—by accident, which is the funniest thing about the whole situation. I'm never gonna leave you behind." He claps his hand on my shoulder. "And I'm always going to be here to support you. Which is why I just wanna know how it's going with the biggest pop star in the world."

The smile that spreads across my face isn't one I can stop or that I even want to. "Last night was amazing. It was one of the best nights I've ever had."

"Different than the last girl?" He raises an eyebrow.

I blow out a breath. "Christina and I were together off and on for nine years, Bret. If it had been a good relationship, it wouldn't have gone on that long without me proposing to her. There were a lot of problems with she and I. Neither one of us knew how to fix it, but now, being with Willa? I realize we just didn't match each other's energies. We weren't what each other needed.” I stretch my arms above my head. “I mean, you've seen Christina's Instagram posts with her new man, Thompson. They are goddamn glowing. She texted me the other day," I offer. I hadn't planned on telling him this, but I've already started it now.

"Oh, did she?"

"Yeah. She's pregnant, and they're announcing it. They got engaged last week, and she wanted to give me a heads-up since we'll be playing his team in week ten. It was nice of her to do that, and I'm extremely happy for her. She deserves it, and she's gonna be a great mom." I mean every word I say, and although I’d thought I might feel sad when I thought about what could've been with her, I don't.

"That's a really mature take from you. I'm proud of you for realizing it." Bret folds his arms over his chest. "The you a year ago wouldn't have been able deal with that, even if you were the one who asked for it to end."

"All true. I just wasn't in a good place mentally. Not after losing the big game the way we did."

Bret nods but doesn't say anything for a few minutes. "Yeah, losing by a fuckin' field goal was a bitch. I'm not sure I'll ever get over it."

Coach whistles, motioning for all of us to come in and take a knee. It's hard, but I'm trying to forget the heartache from last year. I have to admit, though, Willa's helping more than I’d ever thought she would.

Chapter Sixteen

Willa

"How was recording today?" My childhood best friend, Avery, says as she and I sit on the balcony of my Nashville penthouse.

Because we're so far up, I feel safe to talk to her as if we're inside. "It was good, but I don’t think a rock album is for me. It was a lot of fun, but I can’t imagine how that would fit into the touring schedule. This tour is one of the most physical I’ve ever done, and I can’t see that they’ll get any easier." I muse. "It's more physical than anything I've done in my life. When I set out to do it, I wasn't sure I was going to be able to, because I've never been hugely athletic."

"Yeah, but you forget, I've seen your show a few times now, and I know what you're work ethic is like. I had no doubts, and I have to admit—it's really fun watching you on the TikTok and Instagram videos. You're having such a good time. The smile on your face is genuine, and I can see how happy you are." Avery takes a drink of her beer.

I'm nursing mine. It's been a while since I drank two nights in a row. Once I knew I was going on this tour, I worked out how long the show would be, and started working out, it was evident I wouldn't be able to continuously indulge in all the consumables I tend to enjoy. Drinking, heavy food, not getting my water in… It was a choice I had to make if I wanted to do this tour, and these shows, justice.

"I am happy." My voice is raspy—it's almost constantly like this now, because the shows are so long.

Avery doesn't know about Blake though, and I'm about to blow her mind. "Did you hear about Blake Whitfield wanting to give me a friendship bracelet?" I drop the question as casually as possible.

She rolls her eyes, her smile hiding behind her beer. "I'd have to be living under a damn rock not to have heard about it."

"Good. Then I don't have to explain what led up to this."

She drops the beer down. "Led up to this? Oh, whatever you haven't been telling me is going to be good, isn't it?"

"It's going to be as good as I make it. Either way, Blake got in touch with me after he talked about wanting to give me his phone number. We had help from other people, but in the end, we were given a way to contact each other. For the past few weeks, he and I have been hanging out."

She giggles. "Have you been hanging out, or have you been hanging out? We both know there's two different kinds. Are you prepared to tell me?"

"You know there aren't many people I'm completely honest with." I play with the edge of my shirt. "But I'm always honest with you."

"Which is why I'm screaming and kicking my feet inside, waiting to hear what you're going to tell me. It's hard to be patient with you, Willa, but I'm dying to know what you've been hiding from me."