Page 39 of Claiming Chaos
I looked into his eyes, a sense of resolve washing over me. “You’re right. It’s time I stopped hiding behind my weaknesses. I’m an effing Holland witch, and I need to act like one. I deserve respect.”
“You should demand it.” He shook his fist, rallying me even more.
“I should. I’m going to find that book and reverse this spell, and then Chrys isn’t going to know what hit her. I’ll be the Stealth Bomber. A ninja. A Jack-in-the-box that pops before it’s supposed to and scares the crap out of anyone who plays with it.” I marched toward the stacks.
“That’s my girl. Silent but deadly.”
I stopped short and spun around. “That’s what my dad calls his farts, and I am not a puff of stinky wind.”
“You are a hurricane.”
“Damn right I am.” I had to think. Binding magic was used way back when during the witch hunts to keep children from revealing their powers. Mothers would bind their magic when they were out in public and release it when they made it to the safety of home. I’d bet my left boob that’s what my mom did to me.
“It’ll be an old book, circa the sixteen hundreds.”
“Don’t think too hard. Let your magic guide you.” He picked up a stack of books from the floor and set them on a shelf.
The excitement of my little speech had my heart racing, so I took a deep, cleansing breath and centered myself. “What spell did you use to bind me and where is the book?”
A tug in my chest led me to the back of the library, straight to the secret shelf where we’d found the aura-shrouding spell. A pale yellow book with a cloth cover leaned haphazardly against the end of the unit, and I grabbed it, flipping it open to the correct page.
My mother’s elegant handwriting filled the margin. “‘Spell must be rejuvenated every six months to keep fire subdued.’”
A lump formed in my throat, and I swallowed hard. “She’s been casting the spell on me every six months for my entire life, and I didn’t have a clue.”
He rested his hand on my lower back and peered at the page. “How long have your parents been missing?”
“About six months.” I carried the book to my desk and laid it open.
“That would explain why you could tap into your full power in New Orleans. The binding is losing its potency, and your fury helped you break through.”
“Huh.” Pressure built in the back of my eyes, and a sob threatened to escape my throat. “This is such a simple spell. I mean, I guess it had to be for parents to be able to cast it every day without depleting their vim. She just…”
Another sob rolled up from my chest, and I swallowed it too. “I know she did it for the greater good, but damn. Couldn’t she have told me what was going on? If I’d known why my magic didn’t work right… Did she not realize what it did to my self-esteem?”
He pulled me to his chest. “I’m sure she did what she thought was best.”
Tears gathered on my lower lids. I blinked them away and pulled from his embrace. “It doesn’t matter. I can break the spell. It’s so effing simple.” I scoffed at the ludicrousness of it all. My entire sense of self-worth had been determined by a spell used on kindergarteners in the sixteen hundreds. Sadly, that tracked for old Ash.
Not anymore.
“Let’s go to the kitchen. I’ll need a potion.” I carried the book upstairs and set it on the counter before gathering my copper bowl and my mortar and pestle. Eucalyptus, hyssop, and sage combined with lemon oil would dissolve whatever was left of the binding, and I could…
“You’re still afraid.” Chaos’s deep voice drew me from my thoughts.
I blinked and stared at the counter where I’d laid out everything I needed for the potion but hadn’t mixed a thing. “Not scared, no. It’s surreal to think about. If we had time to wait, my magic would come back on its own. I don’t know. This is weird.”
“Indeed.” He opened two herb jars and slid them toward me. “But if you want to finish this before the others arrive, you should get started.”
I crushed the eucalyptus and hyssop and mixed it with the powdered sage before adding three drops of lemon oil. It flashed and sizzled, and I dumped it into a half-glass of water and swirled it around. “Undo, unbind the magic I find. Set me free. So mote it be.”
The liquid turned pale blue, and my heart hammered in my chest, excitement making my hands tremble. I took a deep breath, and then another, while Chaos watched me intently.
“Bottoms up.” I pressed the cool glass to my lips and tipped it back, downing the contents in two gulps. My stomach burned and bubbled, a fizzy sensation rising to my chest before cascading down my arms and legs. A fist clenched in the core of my being, and an audible pop sounded from deep within, flooding my veins with heat.
I set the glass in the sink and looked at my hands. Was that it? Could my magic flow freely like it was supposed to now?
Chaos raised a brow. “And…?”