Page 72 of Say It Again
AT SOME point, Daniel and Olivia had reassembled on the floor. It wasn’t that the couch was bad. Nothing was bad, but the floor had room to spare, and just because it was scattered with dust and random unpopped kernels of popcorn didn’t mean it wasn’t a lovely place to belly dance. Which he did with flourish from where he lay on his back beneath the coffee table with his shirt rolled up to his chest because it was making Olivia giggle.
“You’re so good at that,” she said, her eyes wide with awe. “You are the best belly dancer on this floor.”
“And you are really beautiful,” he said, rolling over to face her. “You’re the best friend on this floor.”
“Daniel, that is so sweet.” She pressed a hand to her heart and puckered her face. “Let me know if you want to make out a little later.”
“Will do.” He rolled to his back and flicked the underside of the coffee table a few times to make sure it was sturdy. It was. “You know who else is beautiful?”
“Mm-hmm. Nutella.”
He melted into a longing smile. “Aaron. Aaron is so beautiful.”
“Oh sweet butter sculpture of Jesus,” she groaned, fanning herself. “That man. I’ve only seen that one picture of him, but he looks like he was handcrafted by the gods from granite and unicorn sperm.”
“Unicorn….” He squinted. “Sperm.”
“And Nutella.”
“Ahh, okay. Now that I think about it, yep. I could see that,” said Daniel, who definitely couldn’t.
“I told you to give him a chance, and look at you now. God, I adore being right. Now you guys are all You’re the wind beneath my wings. Let’s have babies together.”
“The condoms protect us from an unwanted pregnancy.”
“I better be the maid of honor. Don’t deny me that.”
“Okay, but if I make you maid of honor”—he rotated to face her again, pointing sternly—“you have to promise not to bang the best man.”
“Who’s the best man?”
“Probably Aaron’s brother.”
Olivia rolled her eyes. “I’m not going to bang Aaron’s….” She trailed off, a frown pouting her lips. “Why not?”
“Okay, fine. But you have to give me all the slutty details.” He began ticking off fingers. “I’ll need the size of things, the quality, and how quickly things get sturdy when those things are excited.”
“Slutty details are part of my responsibility as maid of honor. I take it seriously. Speaking of Aaron.” She jumping-jacked her arms and legs a few times as if she were trying to make a snow angel on the area rug. “How are you dealing with the whole escort thing?”
He poked the tip of a popcorn kernel with his finger. “Phenomenally.”
“Really?”
“No! Have you ever met me?”
“A lot.”
“I am so into him.” He curled into himself and moaned. “I want to crawl inside his skin and live there.”
“Sounds murder-y.”
“You want to know a secret?”
“Is it detailed and slutty?”
“He doesn’t know this—” He swiped his tongue over his teeth to make sure they were still there. They were, which was how he was able to say, “But my long-term goal is to just wait it out. He can’t do what he does forever, right? Eventually he’ll have to quit.”
Olivia pressed her lips together and popped them loudly, over and over. Daniel tried to join but couldn’t get his as loud.