Page 28 of Big Britches
“She must be a sophisticated woman to have such a charming son.”
“Charming? Really?” Titus chuckled. “I don’t know about that. As far as first impressions go, you’re the winner, hands down. First day on a new job and you hit the ground running, busting with fresh ideas for the place. And now, you’re playing shrink to a clearly fucked up employer who showed up to greet you in a skimpy swimsuit with nothing better to do than hold hands over lunch.”
“Well, it’s not exactly part of my job description.” Pedro said, mock-seriously, then grinned. “But really, I don’t mind. I can see you’re struggling with something.”
“I just… it’s a small town, and it’s hard for me. I feel like–and I know it’s ridiculous–but I feel like folks have an image of me, and I don’t wanna let them down.”
“By coming out?”
Titus nodded.
Pedro inhaled deeply, then spoke. “I’m closeted, too, in a different way. Being a sponsored worker, I always feel like—” Pedro briefly thumbed through his mental files to find a suitable expression. “I’m walking on eggshells. I’m always afraid I’ll make the wrong move, say the wrong thing–anything that might get me deported. As far as my sexuality, I was out to my parents and friends as a teenager in Mexico. But here, in America, I keep it hidden because I don’t want to risk bringing any attention to myself. It’s hard playing subservient when, inside, you just want to break free and be yourself. I keep reminding myself that one day I won’t have to.”
“Sounds like we have a lot in common.”
“No.” Pedro’s eyes narrowed. “Not at all. And that, my friend, would qualify as sensitive.”
“Sorry.” Titus winced. “What I meant is we both keep a part of ourselves hidden.”
“Yes.”
“And we’re gay.”
“Yes again–and I know it seems mammoth to you now–but you really don’t have a lot to worry about when people discover your secret. You were born here and your family has money. We couldn’t be any more different.”
“I don’t want to be different. I like you, Pedro.”
Pedro bypassed the sentiment, clearly vexed. “And you’re used to getting what you want.”
“Touché.”
“What’s going on with you is ego.”
That comment stung. Only those close to Titus had ever called him out about his shortcomings. Yet, here was a man he just met, telling him like it is. It was a wake-up call and hearing it from Pedro made it even more valid.
“You’re right,” Titus said. His voice lifted with a lilt. “You’ve got a little bit of a temper there.”
Pedro’s glare softened. “You’re not going to have me deported, are you?”
“No. Never.”
“I’m sorry if I overstepped my bounds.”
“Not at all. Thank you for being honest with me.”
“You’re welcome.” Pedro’s smile returned and, to Titus, it was warmer and brighter than the sun. He knew in that moment he could live for that smile.
“Anyway,” Pedro continued. “I’m the one that digressed now. You were saying that you feared letting people down by coming out.”
“Ugh.” Titus grimaced. “Now, it just sounds stupid.”
“No. It’s not. Feelings are valid. Are you worried that because of your wealth and status, some may already harbor resentment?”
“No doubt.”
“And maybe that ill will would extend to Tucker?”
“Yes.”