Page 65 of Big Britches
“Your father?”
Pedro nodded. “His decline and death began a chain of events I never foresaw. I know you’ve been through it, too, and please don’t think I’m suggesting my father’s death was more devastating than Violet’s was for you–or anyone, for that matter.”
“No. I get it. You were a teenager forced to become an adult early. You sacrificed your dreams in order to provide for you and your mother.”
“I also did things I’m not proud of.”
“We all have secrets, P. I’m ready to listen whenever you see fit to tell me–if you ever want to tell me. No pressure there. But it won’t change the way I feel about you. That, I promise. Our situation may be similar, but you and Tucker have something in common, too, you know? He lost his mother. Maybe subconsciously I’m moving fast to spare him similar distress.”
“It’s hard losing a parent, but it’s even worse when you’re young. I thought I was invincible. Then one day I wasn’t. Suddenly, I had to factor making money, our well-being, safety, quality of life–all at sixteen.”
“It’s a lot of responsibility for kid. If it makes you feel better, I’m very fond of the man it molded.” Titus laid his head on Pedro’s shoulder with a sigh. “Makes sense I guess.”
“What does?” Pedro asked.
“Opposites attract. You met your family situation head-on, took the wheel, and now you’re steering toward a better future for the two of you. I ran away, receded, all but disappeared.”
“Whoa. Wait. Both were unique situations involving untimely death. And like you said, we were kids. We did what our defense mechanisms dictated.”
“That’s what I mean. You became a man. I became Big Britches. Not the one I aspired to, but the one people predicted, resting on my laurels while the world kept turning. Forever Truman Shepard’s son.”
Pedro took Titus’s face in his hands. “No. I don’t believe that. Recuperation time is different for everyone. You also had a baby to consider.”
“Tucker is five years old, and I’m still hiding. Nothing has changed.”
“But it has. You’ve been–we’ve been going out more. And you and Alden are selling your business, considering another. And tonight we’re having dinner with your parents.”
“I just want to be a better man, P… for you.”
“Listen. When you said those words earlier, I don’t know why they startled me. I know how you feel, and I love you, too, T–and Tucker. I’m just stuck in this weird pattern of everything needing to be perfect before I can consider happiness. I don’t know if it’s inherent, or if it came with the onset of becoming breadwinner, but you’ve made me see it now for what it has become–a crutch.”
Relief welled with the tears in Titus’s eyes, but he pressed on with the subject, nodding vehemently. “I get it. We both put family first. You told me yourself what your priorities were. You’re a well-oiled machine that way and I respect it. Tucker and me, well, we’re the monkey wrench.”
Pedro chuckled at the fragmented idiom through tears of his own. “Love… is a monkey wrench.”
“It’d make a good book title.”
“Yeah.” Pedro wiped at his eyes. “By one of those obnoxious self-help gurus.”
“We’re gonna be a little late for dinner now, but I don’t care.”
“Me either.” Pedro pulled Titus down for a kiss. After, he flashed a cartoonish grimace. “Well, maybe a little. First impressions, you know?”
“Then grab your flowers, my dear. It’s time for you to meet my parents.”
The Shepherd home was similar to the Hawthorne House in that both mansions were near the town square, but the Shepherd home was a Victorian from the early 1900s.
“I had no idea,” Pedro said, getting out of the truck. “I drive by this house every day.”
Titus smiled. “It’s Spoon, remember? You could drive by most things every day.”
“It’s gorgeous. It looks a lot like the farmhouse.”
“Yeah. Pretty much the same. Mama just enjoys being in town more.”
They strolled up the front walkway in the early evening twilight.
“You nervous?” Titus asked.