Page 68 of Tailwhip

As I am cooking, I noticed Avan has made himself scarce. As I am adding the finishing touches on everything, Cora and Neha get the table set and we sit down for dinner. “Is your brother not eating with us?” Neha asks Cora.

Cora just shrugs her shoulders, and I don’t know either.

“We can save him some food.” I tell Neha.

We are all quiet while we stuff our faces with tacos, chips, salsa, and guacamole!

“I think I want to go in the hot tub tonight. I am sore already from riding!” I tell the girls.

“Oh, yeah! Let’s do the hot tub. Hot chocolate with Kahlua? Or we can do coffee and baileys, too!” Neha adds in.

“For you waking up with a hangover this morning, I am surprised you would want to drink tonight!” Cora tells Neha.

Waving her hand, Neha says, “I feel good now that my belly is full of good homemade food!”

We clean up, all change into our bathing suits, and get into the hot tub. The warm water instantly feels good on my sore muscles.

I have my head leaned back on the edge of the hot tub with my eyes closed, relaxing when Neha breaks the enjoyable silence. “Okay, I have waited long enough. Spill everything about you and Avan.”

I keep my head back and my eyes closed while I tell Neha everything about Avan and me. I start from when the Hendrix family first moved to Colorado Springs. Cora and I were in first grade, Avan was in fourth. So, naturally, he picked on me as Cora’s friend, but middle school started, and things changed between us. He would always walk me home every day or night, whenever I left. I also let Neha know how my mom never really liked Avan, due to the age difference, which to me wasn’t a big deal. It was only for two years. “The summer after sophomore year was when he finally asked me on a date, and after that, we were inseparable.”

I finally look over at Neha and Cora. “So, what happened then? Why did you all break up and how did I not even know about you all?”

I take a deep breath because I haven’t thought of this in a long time, and it is bringing up emotions I pushed way down.

I'm hesitating to tell her, but I push forward, anyway. “We had to keep it a secret. Only the Hendrix family knew. They didn’t care about us dating, but my mom did.”

That’s when Cora adds in, “Yeah, my mom and dad seriously hoped Ashlynn would be their daughter-in-law; that’s how much we all love her!”

I laugh at that because I forgot the Hendrix family ever told me that.

“Why do I have a bad feeling about this?” Neha asks.

I look at her. “Your feelings are not wrong. Like I said Avan, and I were inseparable. Cora let me use her as an excuse really to see Avan, but I still hung out with her just as much. So, I guess at first my mom didn’t question anything.”

I have Neha’s full attention; she looks entranced with this story of my first love. “So, we had to hide our relationship, and we did until the summer when it all blew up in our faces. Pictures, gifts, anything from Avan had to be hidden.” I am starting to get teary-eyed. “One day shortly after summer break started after junior year for us, we were out somewhere, I don’t remember, but we obviously were not being careful or just started getting careless, because we were holding hands and kissing–showing affection like a young couple.” I take a deep breath and close my eyes; I can feel a tear escape and feel Neha grab my hand.

I wipe my tears. “That night I was back at the Hendrix house; I think we were just playing Mario Kart or some game when my mom called me. She was just yelling at me, telling me to get my ass home. So, as usual, Avan walked me home like he always did. My mom came charging outside, telling him to get the hell away from me.”

Now I feel anger brewing thinking about that night. “I tried to calm her down, saying he was just walking me home. She grabbed my arm and dragged me inside the house. As soon as we were in the living room, my heart sank, Neha, because every picture I had of Avan and me was out on the coffee table. Pictures I had hidden–that she searched my room for.”

I stop for a minute because this is a reason my mom and I don’t have much of a relationship when Neha says, “I don’t like where this is going, but I knew your mom was mean. I think I am about to really learn how mean, aren’t I?”

I nod my head at Neha’s question. “I asked her why she had my pictures. She just shook her head at me, saying ‘Ashlynn Skylar Black, you will never see that boy again. He only has and wants one thing from you, and I am sure you already gave it to him.’” Neha and Cora both have wide eyes–Cora hasn’t heard any of this either. “After that, I started to grab the pictures and told her she just didn’t know Avan and he wasn’t like that. She ripped the photos out of my hand and threw them all into the fire.” That opens the dam. I thought I did a good job blocking that out, but I guess when asked about it, everything is right there like it was that night. “So, I have nothing of Avan anymore, Neha. That’s why I never talked about it and to this day, I still have no idea how she even found out. About a month later, Mr. Hendrix was transferred for his job, and I never saw Avan again, until today.”

We are all quiet after I finish. I am happy Neha knows that now. She now knows why I hold on to things and people I love so hard and fight for what I want. I had one taken away from me. “I always knew your mom was mean, but damn. That’s not right. To burn all your memories. What the hell. Now I understand why you were so hellbent on moving when you turned eighteen.” Neha says out of nowhere.

I lean my head back and look up at the stars and blow out a breath and watch it in the cold air. “Then you met Anthony.”

I look over at Cora. “What?”

She repeats what she just said. “Then you met Anthony, senior year. I remember you telling me about him.”

I bite my lip and smile. “Then I met Anthony, and I wasn’t prepared for Anthony Ville. He knocked me on my ass and turned my world upside down.”

I never thought I would find love like the way I found it with Avan, but when Anthony came into my life, he showed me that love had no boundaries and he loved with such an intensity that has never been matched.

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