Page 40 of Fletch
“There was no one to show me how to love as a kid,” I admit, “so I don’t reckon I could love my own.”
“It can’t be taught, Fletch. It comes naturally.”
I stare out the window. “Yeah, well, what if it doesn’t happen for me and I have a kid who I can’t love?”
“Is that why you’ve never settled down?” she asks, her tone gentler.
“Do you think you’d have had kids with your kinky ex?”
She laughs. “No, probably not. We’re both too career focussed.”
“He’s a surgeon, right?”
She nods. “He was going into private work, lip fillers and stuff. He wanted to open his own surgery.”
“And he had no interest in kids?”
“Maybe.” She shrugs, her nose scrunching slightly. “We didn’t discuss it properly, but I have a feeling he would’ve wanted me tied to the house the second I married him. He always loved the idea of dinner parties and me waiting for him at the door each evening. Of course, I was always working too, and he hated that.”
Luna comes over and places a tray of warm bread and dips between us. “Hi,” she says, smiling at Gemma.
“Hi,” she replies. “This smells amazing.”
“Just give me a shout when you want topping up.” Then, she heads back into the kitchen.
“I can see why she appeals to you,” Gemma says, bringing me from watching Luna. “She’s pretty.”
“If Grizz hears you, he’ll break my fingers,” I tell her, grabbing a chunk of bread and dipping it in the vinegary oil. “And probably scoop out my eyeballs with a spoon.”
“Tell me what happened between you, so my life doesn’t seem so tragic.”
I sigh, chewing the bread before saying, “We fucked is all.”
“Bullshit. You caught feelings.”
“Maybe,” I admit, shrugging. “But she loves Grizz, and he loves her. I missed out cos I was always thinking with my dick and not my heart.”
“Who do you fuck now?” she asks, biting into some of the bread.
“What?” I ask, almost choking.
“Don’t you have club bunnies, or whatever you call them, to meet your every need?”
I laugh. “Yeah, we do. And currently, I ain’t fucking anyone but you.”
She almost smiles again. “Don’t be reading into it,” she says, smirking. “I don’t need you getting attached or anything.”
I laugh louder and she joins me. “You planning on breaking my heart, Snap?”
She nods. “I owe you one.”
“Yah know,” I say, pausing to look her in the eyes, “it’s easy to forget we’re supposed to be enemies when we’re like this.”
Her smile fades. “Take out all the bullshit and we’re just two old friends catching up.”
“It’s like old times, though, like we were never apart.”
“Things seemed to get serious between us really quickly back then. One minute, we were having fun together, and the next . . .” She trails off. “Well, the next, you got cold feet and ran.”