Page 91 of Secrets & Sake
Tugging hard, he drags me toward the altar. Blood makes the steps slick beneath my feet. Crimson drops pitter-patter off the edges of the altar like rain. There’s so much blood in the air, I can taste it when the wind blows.
I don’t want to die. I can’t. Hideyoshi holds firm as I struggle, then slams me against the altar. Holding my neck in place, he grips the short sword, the blade coated in blood.
Namikawa laughs. “We are so close now!” His voice is odd. There’s someone else speaking beneath his worn voice. A woman’s, deep and melodic. “Hurry, wolf. I grow weary of this frail body.” Lightning flashes, revealing the tall shadow of a woman with a fox’s head and nine lashing tails where Namikawa stands.
It’s Tamano-no-Mae, speaking through Namikawa.
My hand shakes on the altar’s wet surface.
Raiden? Can you hear me?
Tears sting my eyes.
I’m so sorry that I pushed you away. I was stupid and scared. I let my family come between us. Please, forgive me. I should have trusted your feelings. Thank you for choosing me. If I could do things over again, I would choose you over everything else every day for the rest of my life.
I love you.
Goodbye.
Tears run down my face. Hideyoshi slides the blade beneath my throat. The metal is cold and wet. I close my eyes tight.
Something around my finger begins to vibrate, then pulls taut against my skin. My eyes fly open as the red thread of fate glows crimson.
A roar splits the air. The earth shakes as something huge barrels toward us. Hideyoshi drops the dagger and stumbles out of the way. Namikawa whirls around, claws long and sharp. An enormous, clawed hand covered in black fur rips Namikawa off his feet and sends him flying down the steps.
A growl rumbles like thunder, quivering the earth. Dread freezes me in place. Then, two huge, clawed hands lift me off my feet and clutch me against a powerful chest covered with black fur.
Terror grips me as the face of an enormous wolf stares down at me, a snout full of fangs inches from my face. His body is human enough, minus the claws and all the black fur covering every inch of his skin.
It’s his face that unsettles me; he looks like a wolf-man straight out of a horror movie. His body bulges with muscle and his hands are large enough to crush my head between them. Wrapped around one of his long fingers is the little red thread.
“R-Raiden?” I whisper, unable to believe what I’m seeing.
The wolf parts his huge jaws and growls in a deep low voice, “Hey, Sunshine.”
Chapter 25
Where am I?
Everywhere I turn, I’m surrounded by darkness.
I remember running from Hiro—Jinta’s apartment, my heart a shattered mess in my chest. Driving around in my car. Trying to forget. Called Hideyoshi, told him everything. Then Namikawa summoned me to his office. I went and… and then nothing. My memory is completely blank. Screams come from far away. People beg for mercy. A copper tang hits my nose, the scent overpowering.
Shit. Is Namikawa controlling me right now?
Fear wraps around my insides. What the hell is he making me do?
Raiden? Can you hear me?
My heart skips a beat. That’s Jinta’s voice. The sweet aroma of cherry blossoms washes away the stench of blood and death. He speaks to me and every word makes the red thread around my finger thrum and ripple. He tells me he’s sorry, that he wishes he hadn’t pushed me away, that he chooses me the way I chose him.
And then he says, I love you, and all the breath lodges in my chest as my heart races out of control.
When I was eight, I’d learned that those three little words my father once whispered to my mother had no meaning. I never wanted to love or be loved, so I’d built walls around myself.
Yet here he is, this man who smells like cherry blossoms in spring, telling me he chooses me. That he loves me. Words I never knew I needed to hear that defy everything I thought I knew about myself.
Goodbye.