Page 66 of Love Me Not
Fifty denials and deflections buzzed through my brain, but I was determined to keep them to myself. Trey didn’t need to know that what I said and what I felt were drastically different, and I appreciated him going out of his way to see some good in me, even if I didn’t see it myself.
Becca had said similar things over the years, but those were easy to ignore. She was my best friend. She had to say nice things about me. Then again, if I was as off-putting as I claimed to be, why would she be my friend at all? Maybe I assumed I was grandfathered into her good graces because we’d been inseparable since third grade.
But that didn’t apply to the others.
Josie and Megan met me in college, and Donna well after that. Yet they’d embraced me the same way Becca had, almost from day one. All together, there was enough evidence that perhaps I needed to reevaluate my perception of myself, but even considering taking that deep dive made me squirm. If I wasn’t the lip-snarling, resident grump, then who was I?
Confused and speechless, I moved the food around my plate in silence. Being so thoroughly seen by someone, especially in a positive light, was a new experience. No one I’d ever gone out with took the time to look at me. Like, really look. In a way, that was all I’d wanted. To find someone willing to get past the snark and defensive sarcasm to the person underneath it all.
I was never going to have a mushy center, but that didn’t mean there weren’t vulnerable little pockets of goo tucked in there somewhere. They were deep, but they were there.
Voice low, Trey asked, “Do you want to change the subject?”
“Yes, please.”
Without a hint of humor or disdain, he nodded. “We can do that.”
The walk back to my place was significantly colder than the one we’d taken to get there. I had no idea how Trey wasn’t freezing. He wasn’t even wearing a coat, yet I found myself moving closer to absorb the body heat coming off of him.
“Thank you for dinner,” he said as we moved around a couple coming from the other direction.
“You paid for your own,” I reminded him.
“You picked a really good restaurant, and came with me. So thanks for the food and the company.”
Swallowing my natural urge to deflect, I said, “You’re welcome.” Trying to pull my head down into the collar of my coat, I said, “Are you really not cold?”
He stuffed his hands into his pockets and hitched his shoulders up to his ears. “I am, actually. I need to stop leaving my coat in the truck.”
Teeth chattering, we picked up the pace and made the rest of the walk in silence. Once we reached my building, I expected Trey to peel off to his truck, but instead he followed me to the building entrance.
“You don’t have to walk me to the door.”
“Sure I do,” he said, shoulders still hunched.
Hugging my cheesecake container to my chest, I said, “Is this another one of those your mom is watching moments?”
Trey nodded. “It is, but even if she wasn’t, I’d still walk you to your door.”
The chivalry was completely lost on me, but I didn’t argue. Unlocking the outside door, I led the way down the hall to my apartment. After a quick turn of the key, I pushed the door open while saying, “You got me here safe and sound, thanks.”
Bright blue eyes widened as he peered over my head. “Do you have a roommate?”
“No, I live alone. Why?”
He nudged me to the side and stepped into the open doorway. “Wait here.”
What… Why would I wait in the hall? And who invited him inside? As he almost silently went in, I noticed him doing some crime drama cop stuff.
Leaning forward to glance down toward the kitchen, he called out, “Is anyone here?”
Following him, I said, “I just told you?—”
Trey spun and held one finger to my lips in the universal signal for hush. Did they spike his pop or something? What was he doing? As I was about to ask, he motioned for me to look around, so I did.
“What the he?—”
He shushed me again and whispered, “Let me make sure no one is here.”