Page 61 of The Broken Prince
“It’s not that complicated, Father. You betrayed Mother. Period. If this were the other way around, I’d be just as furious with her.”
“Really?” That seemed unbelievable, judging by her harshness. “Because I would never want that. No one deserves to watch their daughter hate them for something they don’t even understand. No one deserves to lose their daughter. I would never, ever want your mother to go through this, no matter what she did.”
She stared, the book open on her lap. “I don’t hate you.”
“You said you did.”
“But I didn’t mean it.”
“It seems like you mean it. You refuse to speak to me. You refuse to see me. We haven’t spoken in over a month, and it seems like you’re perfectly fine not having a father. Seems like you embraced General Macabre as my replacement just fine.” I felt the tears buried deep behind my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. “You must have heard about the attack on Delacroix, but you haven’t cared to check on me.”
“There was an attack on Delacroix?” she asked blankly.
Maybe she didn’t know.
“Father?”
“I didn’t come here to talk about that—”
“Is everyone okay? Harlow? Aunt Ivory—”
“They’re all fine,” I said quickly. “We can talk about that after we finish this discussion.”
“You just told me Delacroix was attacked, but we’re going to talk about you sleeping around—”
“I didn’t sleep around.” Now I was really losing my cool. “You don’t have the full story. I know you’re smart, but you clearly lack the maturity to understand that what happened with your mother is way more complicated than you assume. You chose sides like a child and didn’t even give me the chance to explain anything. Nothing that happens between your mother and me should affect our relationship with you.”
“Fine. Then tell me what happened.” She crossed her arms over her chest.
I dragged my hands down my face, feeling like I was on trial. “Lila, I feel like you’re going to judge and vilify me no matter what I say. You’ve already made up your mind. I’m in unbearable pain as it is, and the last thing I want to do is open my heart to you and be judged for it. I know I’m the parent so I need to be the bigger person here, but Lila, you’re a grown-ass adult now. You need to stop acting like a child. Even if I were some unrepentant adulterer, it shouldn’t change our relationship. There’s no mistake you could ever make, no matter how shameful, that would ever change my love for you. But a mistake was all it took for you to forget I ever existed…” Being a parent was a challenge, and up until my separation from Avice, it’d all been worth it because my daughter was my pride and joy, but now it was the most painful, excruciating thing I’d ever done. There were no words to describe the horror of being the recipient of your child’s hatred.
Her eyes dropped as she considered what I said, her arms folded over her body.
Why the fuck had I come here? Did I really think a reunion with her mother would make her forgive me? I’d tried for months and months to get my daughter to say two words to me, but I was done trying. I left the couch and headed to the door. “The Teeth have formed an alliance with enemies to the east of the mountains. They’re the ones who attacked us, but there’s nothing to worry about because we’ll defeat them with our armies and dragons.” I wouldn’t tell her the truth. I wouldn’t scare my daughter if it could be avoided. I opened the door and walked out.
“Father.” She was behind me in the doorway.
I looked down the street, feeling the heat from the torch on the back of my neck.
“I’m sorry…”
I didn’t look at her. It was too fucking hard. Those tears I battled were breaking through.
“Come inside…let’s talk.” Her hand moved to the back of my arm and gently pulled, trying to get me to come back inside.
I blinked back the tears that were becoming harder to fight.
She gently pulled me again—and this time, I let her.
Her eyes were no longer harsh, but soft like they used to be, full of light and warmth. But then they saddened, probably seeing the evidence of my tears along my lids. “It’s okay, Father.” Her arms moved around me, and she hugged me…hugged me.
My arms hooked around her body instantly, and I sucked in a deep breath, squeezing her tightly. “Sweetheart…”
* * *
She listened to the tale without interruption.
“It doesn’t justify what I did, but…we’d been having problems for a long time with no reconciliation in sight…and I made a mistake.”