Page 66 of The Wolf's Mate
“I know what I said yesterday, but seeing Thorne leave and feeling completely helpless…it’s a horrible feeling, Hettie. I don’t want to feel useless. I want to help in any way I can,” Tallie explains.
I understand her need to help and feeling useless. Rip is shouldering too much and not being able to act on my ability hurts. It feels like he still doesn’t completely trust me. Rationally, I know it’s because he just wants to make sure it’s safe to go exploring. But even now I hear the call. Ever since yesterday. Calling me toward a cure that could help so many of my people. Doing nothing feels wrong, but so does betraying Rip’s trust.
Either choice I make will hurt someone. Rip or the sick people on their deathbed. I didn’t have the chance to save my father while he was dying in the hospital, but maybe now I’ll have the chance to save someone else’s parents.
Maybe Rip would understand. He’d have to.
“I think I should go tonight,” I say at last.
Tallie beams, punching the air in triumph. “Great, I’ll?—”
“Me, Tallie. Not you. I’m not pulling you into this shit.”
“Well, consider me pulled in, because I’m going. You think I would let our pack Luna do this by herself? Absolutely not.”
“Rip is going to be so pissed,” I groan. I should ask him to come, but he’s stretched thin with so many alphas gone. He said we would look for wolfsbane when the alphas returned. But can we realistically wait that long? I know I can do this, and I don’t want to add another thing on his plate, especially when it’s something I could do alone. If we’re lucky, he won’t even notice I’m gone.
I sigh, hoping I don’t come to regret this later. “Fine. Tonight. I need to go home and get a few things, but I’ll meet you back here at nightfall.”
Tallie looks far too excited, seeing as we are about to directly defy her cousin. Still, Rip can’t be mad once he sees the risk is worth the reward at the end.
I just hope he sees it that way when he finds out.
Chapter 30
Hettie
The crisp air carries the faint smell of pine and needles. Darkness covers the forest, making visibility difficult but not impossible. It’s quiet, save for Grass’s soft footfalls and woodland creatures scurrying about, trying to find safety for the night.
I pull my red coat tighter around me, reaching down to double-check the ax at my hip is secure and clamp down on the guilt that threatens to take hold of me. Guilt about dragging Tallie into this, even though she was the one to suggest we go, and guilt over going behind Rip’s back.
Getting away from Rip proved to be surprisingly easy. He was summoned to a meeting with members of his patrol, needing to discuss logistics now that a good chunk of their patrol is away.
I had smiled, telling him I just wanted to get some sleep. The worst thing is that Rip believed me. I prayed he didn’t poke around in our bond because then my plan would come undone.
But he didn’t. He trusted me. Gave me a kiss and left.
Now here I am, outside, waiting for Tallie. As guilty as I feel, it’s not enough to make me tuck tail and head back home. I need to do this, even if I can’t quite put into words the reasons why. It simply feels like an inevitability.
The soft crunch of snow has me turning my head to see Tallie approaching. She wears a determined expression as she closes the gap between us. “You ready?” No prelude, just straight to the point.
“As ready as I can be,” I murmur, wanting to get this over with. The faster I get the wolfsbane in my hands, the quicker I can get home and hand off the cure.
“I’m going to travel as a wolf. I’ll be able to hear and see better. I’ll follow your lead, but warn you if something is amiss.” Tallie strips, and I turn my head to give her privacy. The wolves aren’t fazed by nudity, but it’s going to take me more time to warm up to the idea. The sound of broken bones and ripping flesh makes me cringe.
When I turn back around, a large gray wolf stands where Tallie was only moments ago. She’s just as beautiful in this form as she is in her human one. Grass rubs against her flank, wagging his tail excitedly.
At least one of us is excited.
Before I begin our journey, I take a moment to listen to the sounds of the forest. The call for wolfsbane starts again, almost as if it knows I’m ready to find it. It’s a low, gradual sound and pulls me forward. “Let’s go.”
Grass and Tallie fall in line behind me. I’m led by an invisible string, just like the last time. My body is a vessel, and I allow myself to be pulled. The uneven terrain of the forest floor causes me to stumble, and I have to catch myself before I fall on my face. I swear I hear Tallie’s wolf laugh at me.
Unlike the first time, we are pulled deeper into the forest. My hand hovers just above my ax handle. I hope I don’t need it, but I’m not willing to take the chance. It helps me to not feel completely defenseless.
About fifteen minutes into our journey, we come to a drop-off point. I hear running water and make my way to the edge. A steady river flows about six feet below us. Large rocks and fallen tree trunks wedge themselves between the water and the bank. Few things grow on the rocky floor, and I nearly dismiss it.
Except when I try to turn away, the sound grows louder, and I clamp my hands over my ears to drown out the noise. Tallie whimpers, coming to my side and rubbing against me. Except the noise doesn’t stop. It pounds in my head until my vision becomes blurry.