Page 74 of A Forever Love
“Damn, you’re not making this any easier.” He kisses my forehead and leans back on the couch, closing his eyes.
I don’t know if it’s the alcohol, the night, or him, but everything feels like a dream. I trace his lips with my fingers like I’ve always wanted to and the softness surprises me. He kisses each of my digits and then my palm before twining my fingers with his.
“The truth is, I never really thought about the reasons I like you. You were as essential as oxygen to me, and that’s probably why all of this feels so natural.” He looks down at our joined hands. “But if I have to think, it’s what lies beneath all this that makes you the person I love the most.” He tenderly lays his hand over my heart, and my pulse roars in recognition, as if it’s finally found the missing piece it’s longed for all my life.
Emotions that have always felt like a beast ready to tear me apart from the inside have found a crack to escape. “You said…love?” My voice is nothing but a tremor.
“I’m not going to downplay my feelings, Mere. But there’s no rush. Take all the time you need to sort out your heart. I’ll be right here.”
Uncontrollable tears stream down my cheeks. I never prepared myself for this moment, never allowed the darkness in my heart to believe that one day my biggest dream might come true.
“Was it too much?” Carter lifts my face with a finger under my chin.
I shake my head and throw my arms around him. He catches me swiftly, securing me in his lap. “It was…perfect.” I hiccup, hiding my face in his chest. “Th-thank you.”
“You never have to thank me for loving you, mittens. It’s a privilege.”
Time seems to slip away as I stay in his arms, attempting and failing to calm my racing heart. It wants to scream, cry, dance, and do everything all at once. Thankfully, Carter isn’t in any hurry to leave.
“I don’t want to sleep.” In truth, I don’t want this night to end. My anxious heart worries that in the sober light of day, Carter might go back to seeing me as Merida, the young girl he used to babysit. “Tell me something.”
“It was my first birthday after you left. Like every year, I asked Mom the name of that asshole who got her pregnant and then abandoned her before my birth. As usual, her response was silence, and I returned home with a bottle of Scotch. I was in my usual spot, next to the bathtub, and about to take the first sip when I realized you weren’t there anymore to save my ass in the morning. Even when you were miles away, you were with me when I needed you the most. I wish I could have done the same for you, Mere.”
“You did.” I get up from his lap and return from the bedroom in a few seconds. “Remember this?” I hold the silver velvet box in my hand.
He needs less than a beat before recognition flares in his eyes. “I noticed it the other day. I can’t believe you still have it.”
My fingers halt on the tiny golden latch. “Why wouldn’t I?” I unlock the box and lift the heart locket by the gold chain, the one he had given me on my birthday years ago with the word Forever engraved on the back. There’s still a picture of him and me on one side, and Dad and Clem on the other. “You were always with me.”
Even when I was trying to get rid of you.
“I’m happy to hear that.” Carter takes the pendant from my hand. “Turn around.” When I do, he places it around my neck and secures the hook. “Never leave me, mittens. Please.”
The soft whisper of his voice against my neck sends shivers coursing through me. There’s a tiny part of me that rejoices that I wasn’t the only miserable one among us, but Carter’s shaky exhale as he says please clutches my chest. And in this moment, I decide I never want him to be sad or weak.
“I would never.”
He places a kiss on the back of my neck right above the small latch, sending a swarm of butterflies loose in my belly. And as if he has demonstrated more emotion than he should right now, Carter clears his throat and asks, “Do you still watch the movie for him?”
I invite the change in topic and the smile that pulls on my lips. “Definitely.”
He wraps me in his arm, his chin resting on my shoulder. “I can never compete with a speedy vampire on anti-aging drugs.” Carter groans as Edward makes his way to the school canteen on the screen.
“He’s not on anti-aging drugs. His age is frozen.” I chuckle, burrowing myself more into him. At every other beat of my heart, my brain whispers that this is a fantasy and not real. But then Carter tightens his arms around me, holding me close to his chest, and his lips press to my shoulder.
* * *
The next morning, when Miss Sparkles bites my feet, I realize they are resting on the living room floor and not on my bed, and then I feel him behind me. Carter.
I take another breath before slowly turning around. Carter’s head rests against the upholstered couch seat. One arm is thrown over the length of the couch, and the other gingerly lies over my shoulder. The sun isn’t up yet, but the early morning sky is bright, and I’m granted precious moments to be intrusive and admire his face with abandon. A defiant curl rests on his forehead, crossing his eyebrow, and I have a burning itch to place it back. But before my hand can reach out, Miss Sparkles lets out a loud meow, making me jump. I hold her in my arms and go to the kitchen before she wakes up Carter.
“Behave. We have a guest.” I place her food in the bowl. Just as I’m inserting a pod into the coffee machine, I feel him behind me.
“Good morning.” Carter’s breath caresses the side of my face. He closes in on my personal space, stretching his arms over me to grab a cup from the top cabinet. I’m trapped between him and the counter, and it becomes my favorite spot this morning.
After fitting the cup into the machine, Carter presses the button. As the machine roars to life, he slowly turns me around. My breath catches as our gazes meet.
Unlike the cloak of darkness at night, there’s something different in the morning light. Every emotion crossing his face, every word leaving his mouth…it all feels more powerful.