Page 6 of Coyote

“Do you ever intend to put yourself out there again?”

I crammed my keys in my pocket and turned to look my sister in the eye. “It’s really nice that you have Breaker. He’s a solid club brother and I’ve always looked up to him. But you need to understand that not everyone is cut out for relationships.” Slapping my chest with one hand, I say, “Maybe I’m one of those men who’s better off not having relationships if I can’t even figure out what I did to scare off the only woman I every truly loved.”

She was relentless, this sister of mine. “Answer my original question. If you had a do over with Bethany, would you take it, or tuck your tail between your legs and run? Would you take a chance on love or protect your heart?”

“Goddamn, you’re brutal today, sis.”

She raised one eyebrow and I guessed she was waiting for me to answer her fucking question.

“I honestly don’t know. I wasn’t enough for her before. Nothing has changed at my end, so it stands to reason I wouldn’t be enough for her today. If she walked into the clubhouse and climbed into my lap, I can’t say for sure what I’d do.”

“Alright, that’s at least an honest answer.” She took the flyer in her hand and waved it at my chest. “I’m doing everything I can to help you have a better life. Don’t hate me for it.”

I swallowed thickly and jerked my chin towards the front door of the store. “I won’t. Now, let’s get our happy asses in there and get some supplies.”

My sister’s dark expression brightened, and I folded the flyer in two and put it over my visor for safe keeping.

***

We shopped our asses off, getting everything on Callie’s list. I dropped her off at her place and then made a run to my new premises and unloaded my supplies. Standing there in my own business, looking around at all the work that needed to be done, I felt like I’d finally made something of myself.

But there was still that gaping hole that Bethany left behind when she abandoned me. No matter what I tried, nothing ever filled it. I tried drinking, club whores, gambling, shooting pool and long, lonely rides on my bike down the coastline. Nothing helped. I was clearly destined to feel her loss forever.

Bethany was my everything that mattered, right up until she wasn’t. The part that hurt so fucking much was that she didn’t tell me why. She didn’t talk to me or give me a chance to make it better. I thought she loved me, but she couldn’t have felt the same way about me that I did her, because she walked out on me and never looked back.

I decided to save the painting for another day and locked up. When I climbed into the van, the visor fell open a crack when I shut the door. That damned flyer fell out and landed on my lap. I picked it up and read it over. The offer was just like my sister said it was. Fifty percent off for opening a new account. Sighing, I stuffed the flyer in my vest and started the van. I had about enough time to ride out to Effortless Events and see if they could help me with getting the word out about my new business. The idea of making twenty-five percent more money in the first year was too tempting to pass up. Having the fifty percent off flyer made it a no brainer.

All I did during the drive was angst about Bethany and her long, dark, soft hair. Bethany and her pretty brown eyes. Bethany and how beautiful she looked when I made her come. I was both tormented and delighted with those memories. Everything about the idea of her walking back into our clubhouse was bittersweet.

I cursed my sister for bringing up Bethany’s name. It had taken me three and a half years to stop thinking of her night and day, to stop hoping every incoming call was her reaching out to me, and for every woman’s touch to stop reminding me of her. I knew all the way down to my bones that nothing and no one would ever replace Bethany in my life. I was destined to suffer forever. Now she only visited me in my dreams when I laid my head down to rest.

Chapter Three

Bethany

It was midafternoon and this had been the slowest day we’d had in a very long time. I liked staying busy because it made the day go faster. Maybe it was childish, but the highlight of my day was another delivery of miniature helium tanks. Reggie found a good deal on them and ran an advertisement on the local news website and in the free local newspapers. Now, these tiny units were flying off the shelf. So, I was happily spending the afternoon creating a display of them. I was on my knees reaching all the way to the back of a shelf when the door chimed, alerting me that we had a customer.

I shoved the last box in place, calling out, “I’ll be right with you.”

A deep, familiar voice responded, “I’d recognize that fine ass anywhere.”

I jerked back, shocked to find that Lucas of all people was standing over me. Something about me being on my knees before him felt like old times. I can’t count how many times he put me on my knees for his pleasure. I loved it every single time too. Glancing away, I asked, “How did you find me, Lucas?”

“I didn’t come here looking for you. I came because of this.”

When I looked up, he was holding a flyer for our event’s business. He leaned forward and offered me his free hand. When I slid my hand in his it felt like I was giving myself to him, like before.

He tugged me gently to my feet and I fought back tears because it reminded me how kind and gentle he had always been with me. “Thank you,” I murmured as I dusted my hands on my pants.

Lucas’ eyes were laser focused on me. I could see heated interest, the same as I was feeling. It would have been all too easy to step out and wrap my arms around him. But I couldn’t do that. Too much time had passed, putting too much distance between us. He was probably married with kids by now—married to someone who wasn’t a walking magnet for every kind of depraved lunatic that walked the earth. And he was clearly still a biker, if his cut was any indication.

Lucas deserved a good woman, not a fallen one like me, “It’s nice to see you again. You’ve put on some weight.”

He lifted one arm and jerked his chin at me. “It’s all muscle, too.”

Smothering back a smile, I responded lightly, “Still talking yourself up I see.”

“Always. I have to, because no one else is going to.”