Page 95 of Oath of Rebellion
He couldn't lose her. He looked down at Eirwyn. Was she growing colder?
His chest ached, and he set her in the glass and metal coffin. Krys pushed buttons on the side, and the glass closed over her. A pale blue fog filled the coffin, and Knox put his hand on it with a gasp.
"Don't worry. It won't harm her." Krys began to ramble on about the technical details, but Knox was too exhausted to care.
Finally Krys said, "I've set it for twelve hours. We'll reassess and will know more then. That might be all she needs. Come on, Knox. You look like you could use some rest too."
Krys' voice rang with false hope, and Knox' stomach twisted. He shook his head and sat on the floor, his hand never leaving the coffin as he leaned against it. "I can't leave her," he whispered. "Can you fetch me a healing potion and a salve for my back?"
His vision blurred and his hands shook. This was as close to the Edge as he'd ever gotten, too cautious as a child to overuse his magic.
Krys' voice echoed as if from far away. "Alright, but the salve isn't going to help your back. Not with all the scales."
His chest ached, and he ignored Krys. There were no scales on his back, but the crazy old dwarf didn't matter.
He never should've taken her into the heart of the forest. He should've left her at Olive's. She would've been safer there instead of with him. How could he have been so selfish? He'd failed to protect her.
He'd seen dozens of wounded soldiers stumble into the forest with head injuries, but not even half of those survived their wounds. If something happened to Eirwyn before he could tell her how he felt–
He frowned, his eyes growing heavy. Had he really not told her how much he loved her? How much he admired that she never gave up? She was strong, capable, and no wilting wallflower like those in his books or those he saw strolling through town.
He wanted to know everything about her, and it felt like time was slipping through his hands. If she survived, would she stay with him? He'd begged her to agree to the mate bond, but he hadn't explained what that was or what he'd learned in the books in his father's office.
Krys returned with the bottle and ointment then walked away. Knox took both and tossed his head back, the bitter taste making him wince as he chugged it. It burned going down almost as much as the fire on his skin earlier.
She might want to return to Demerel and her life there. If she left him behind in the Feral Forest, alone, yet again... He wouldn't survive without her. She was like air and water, and he needed her to live now.
Despair swept over him, pressing on his chest and making him slump. He was an utter failure.
He unscrewed the lid and dipped his fingers into the gel, then reached behind his neck. He smoothed it over and frowned. His scales, which had previously just wrapped around the back of his head, now extended down his neck and over his shoulders.
He shivered as the gel turned cold on his skin and he peeled the remnants of his shirt off. He felt his back, unable to reach between his shoulder blades to see how far they extended.
Was it the mating bond that was changing him? Did that mean that Eirwyn might live? Surely he wouldn't change if the mating rituals hadn't been completed, and according to the books he'd found, they still had a few more things to do.
He shook his head and dipped his fingers into the ointment, rubbing it around and under the bumps and ridges of his back.