Page 33 of Blood Pearl
Once I have eaten a pile of bacon, scrambled eggs and toast I make my way upstairs and help Alison clean bedrooms. Nobody leaves their rooms in dire state and most place clothing in the laundry baskets, so it’s easy for the cleaning staff to place into baskets on the laundry cart. I’m good at keeping everyone’s things in the correctly labeled baskets, because Goddess forbid, I give female clothing to a male.
The day progresses from one house chore to another, but I am more than pleased with myself. I’ve not complained about any of the menial jobs that have been given to me, like cleaning the bathrooms. Proving something to myself, more than to anyone else.
Walking downstairs to the laundry room where my next two hours will be spent, I stop and turn when I hear my name called.
“Good day, Taria. How are you?” Alpha Chet asks.
Now, I want to be highly respectful as he may be my father-in-law if I can prove to Bronze I am a capable Luna, and a good person in general. Which I am, and I know I am.
“Good day, Alpha Chet. I am well, and I hope you are as well?”
“I am well, Taria. I wanted to wish you good luck, with winning Bronze over. I think you can do it, and I think you’ll be an excellent Luna. Don’t let me down, I’m rooting for you. Luna Sage is looking forward to training you once you come to Eclipse, too. We will leave for the Eclipse Pack soon. Why don’t you speak to Bronze before we go. Just keep your distance so you don’t strike up the bond.”
“Thank you. I am going to do my best to prove to Bronze I can and will be a fit mate to and for him. No, I will not risk seeing him because if we accidentally touch, he would never forgive me. If you can wish him well for me, and inform him I’m doing everything I can to prove my worthiness, I would appreciate it.”
“Taria. You are worthy. Don’t even think that you are not. The only problem I see is you were not guided as you should have been. Alpha Aurora admits she has neglected you in your education by taking over the Blood Pearl Pack. Never run yourself down. You are a good person, and a loving one. Although I have heard it said you are entitled, I can understand why. But I have also heard how much you have done for people, what help you have given and the comfort you have given. All the traits of a good Luna. Now, learn to fight so you don’t have to rely on the pack to fight for you. That will gain you respect when you come to us, otherwise just be yourself. Learn how each pack member serves the pack as it will give you understanding when you later run the Eclipse Pack alongside Bronze.” Alpha Chet squeezes my shoulder when I give him a thank you nod, and a tip of my head to show respect.
“Taria!”
I turn and see Bronze watching myself and Alpha Chet, who steps away but remains at a distance he can step between Bronze and I. Ensuring we do not accidentally activate the bond.
“Hello, Bronze,” I give him a tip of my head in respect before looking away. “I want to wish you well on your journey and stay safe.”
It feels strange speaking to my mate as though we are strangers, but we are if it hadn’t been for the mate bond which I can feel warm and buzzing slightly in my chest.
“I wanted to say I will speak to you occasionally. If that is okay?” Bronze asks, and although my reply is going to hurt, I have to say how I feel.
“To be honest, I would rather you didn’t. If we speak and get to know each other, and you then reject me it will be harder on Maya and myself. I don’t want to lose my wolf if you decide I’m not the one for you. I understand why you are holding back, but you know that you also have to come up to my expectations and so far you only show that you want what you want, and are not thinking of my circumstances. I will see you in six months and I’m sure you will have people watching my actions during that time. I will also consider what I want to happen at that time too. For now, stay safe, my mate.”
I can see the shock on his face, along with Alpha Chet’s. I suppose nobody has considered that I also have choices, and being told you are not good enough leaves a sour taste in your mouth. I want my mate, and Maya is desperate for her mate, which is one of the reasons I have taken none of this badly. But it does sting when your mate doesn’t instantly want you, no matter who or what you are. One thing I have promised myself is I will be a better person, I will learn all that is needed to be the perfect Luna, and even if I don’t become one in reality, I will know I’m capable of it.
“Goodbye, Alpha Chet. Goodbye, Alpha Heir Bronze.” I give a tip of my head as I turn and walk away, holding my spine straight, head high and stopping tears from falling.
Later that day, after the main meal has been served and Cook Ivy dismisses me for the evening, I make my way to my room and shower for the third time. Wearing a t-shirt and panties, I sit on the bed cross-legged and contemplate all that I’ve done today. Also, giving myself the time to consider what I’d said to Bronze. I could see the shock and hurt on his face, but I also saw the realization that he was judging me without knowing me fully.
Tapping on the door before it opens and my Momma pops her head inside. “Can I come in?”
“Yes, of course,” I reply.
Closing the door behind her, Momma steps over to the bed and sits down, making sure she’s facing me as she does. “I wanted to make sure you were okay?”
“I’m okay.”
“I’m sorry that Bronze has not claimed you as his mate immediately.”
“Momma, I understand where he’s coming from, where all of you are coming from. But you know what? None of you have considered that I am what I am because all of you treated me the way you did. I honestly tried to do more, but it was always a case of, ‘I can do it,’ ‘Off you go,’ ‘It’s okay.’ Nobody fully had time for me or listened to me when I tried to get…you know what, it doesn’t matter. It is what it is. If I want my mate, I have to prove I am good enough…” said with air quotes, “but you know he has to prove he’s good enough too, and so far he’s not shown consideration for my feelings. Or proven to me he’s a fit mate. It is okay being a good Alpha Heir, then progress to being a good Alpha, but that doesn’t mean he’ll be a suitable mate.”
“All I want is for you to be happy. You tell me what I can do and I’ll do it. I love you Taria, you are the best thing that ever happened to me, and I’m sorry that I didn’t show it enough, or make sure you knew you mean more to me than anything else in this world.”
“I don’t need you to do anything, Momma. I will do this for myself. Maya and I will prove to ourselves we can do this. I know you love me, and I love you, too. But I suppose I’m all grown up and have to do grown-up things.”
Momma hugs me for a few minutes, kisses the top of my head before heading to the door. As she takes hold of the door handle I speak again, “There is one thing you can do for me if you will?”
“What’s that?”
“Arrange for me to go to Luna Tatiana and Luna Hope. I can shadow them and learn how they are the Luna’s that they have become.”
“I can do that. I will speak with them tomorrow.”