Page 65 of The Breakdown

June once again stood at the door to the guesthouse with a warm plate in her hands. She rapped lightly on the door and glanced around while she waited. Darkness had fallen and the temperature had dropped, the breeze warm. The ranch was quiet, save for the occasional cluck of a chicken or the neigh of a horse. Noises that June found soothing after having been surrounded by them all these years.

The door opened and Natalie welcomed her with a soft smile. Though her hair was wet from a recent shower, she still looked worse for wear. The child appeared gaunt, and her eyes were red-rimmed and swollen. It was obvious she’d been crying some more and June’s heart ached for her. The poor child had been through so much and it seemed she was still fighting some sort of demons, if not Vaughn and the situation with her. But June didn’t pretend to know, because at this point, with Vaughn’s continued silence, she really didn’t have any idea what was going on between the two of them.

Natalie welcomed her inside. They walked to the small table in the kitchen where June uncovered the plate of meatloaf and mashed potatoes with steamed vegetables. It was what they’d had last night, but it was still a good, hearty meal and the boys and Vaughn had gobbled it right up. Which was why June had had to make Natalie a plate ahead of time so the boys wouldn’t eat it all, leaving Natalie with nothing.

June set the plate down and retrieved a fork from the drawer. She sat and motioned for Natalie to join her. Natalie eyed the plate as if was unappealing, but she didn’t argue. But rather she slowly sat and began to pick at the food with her fork.

“That’s a good meal now,” June said, trying to coax her to at least take a bite.

Natalie forked a bite of meatloaf and brought it to her mouth. June watched as she finally ate it, closing her eyes as she chewed.

“Well?” June said.

Natalie swallowed and opened her eyes. “It’s good.”

June nudged the plate closer to her. “Well, eat up now. Before it gets cold.”

Natalie forked another bite and ate it slowly, carefully, as if she were trying to decipher the taste of each tiny morsel. When she finally swallowed, she set her fork down. “I’m sorry, I just don’t have much of an appetite.”

“It’s not the food?”

“The food is good. I’m just not in the mood, June. I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright.” June rose and plucked her a bottle of Lipton iced tea out of the fridge. She brought it to her and sat once again. “At least drink something, darlin’, and stay hydrated. You look like death warmed over.”

“Thanks.”

June squeezed her shoulder. “I don’t mean nothin’ by it. I’m just worried about you.”

Natalie pushed the plate away, but opened the bottle of lemon-flavored tea. She took a delicate sip, then another, and twisted the cap back on.

“I’m sure you are. The way I’ve been acting…” She shook her head as tears flooded her eyes. “I’ve been such an ass.”

“Shh,” June said. “You have a right to be an ass every now and again. Everyone does.”

“But I—it’s more than that, June. I can’t seem to shake it.”

“Well, why don’t you tell me what’s going on, and I’ll see if I can help.”

Natalie exhaled and rested her cheek in her hand. “I’m cranky. All the time. And lately…jealous. Like really jealous. And I’ve never been the jealous type. And on top of that, I’m scared. Terrified that Allen will find me.”

“Well, no wonder why you’re so torn up inside, child. You’ve got a lot going on.”

“Which is exactly why Vaughn says we can’t explore anything together, which saddens me like you wouldn’t believe. But she’s right, isn’t she, June? I’m just too messed up.” She stood and paced, hand to forehead. “God, I’m just so overwhelmed.”

June remained seated, watching her helplessly. “Why don’t we take things one at a time and see if we can get somewhere?” She patted the table, encouraging her to sit once again.

Natalie paused mid stride, seemed to think about it, and then joined her. June rubbed her shoulder.

“Tell me what’s bothering you the most.”

“Right now?” She looked at June with wide eyes.

“Mm-hm. Right at this moment.”

“The jealously.”

“Okay. What are you jealous over?”