Page 97 of Peer & Coco
A big part of her didn't want to know.
She rolled up the window, started the car, and drove to the gate to wait for Dag. It wasn't long, and Dag came out and waved her to go through. Properly escorted, she appreciated not going home alone. The middle of the night made her surroundings formidable, and she had Tyr to think about, too.
The ten-minute ride home put Tyr to sleep. Dag helped her gather her bags while she carried Tyr inside. She whispered her thanks as they approached the front of the house.
Dag put his hand on the door and pulled off a folded piece of paper. "Looks like you've got a note."
She took the paper. "Thanks."
Locking the door behind her, she stuck the tape attached to the paper to the counter and carried Tyr to bed. Thankful that Nita put him in his pajamas and changed his diaper before he left the clubhouse, she laid him down in the crib.
Double-checking the monitor, she walked out of the room. She stopped in the bathroom, grabbed a wet washcloth and scrubbed the makeup off her face as she went out to the kitchen. She wasn't in the mood for ice cream tonight. All she wanted to do was fall in bed and shut off her mind.
She drank a glass of water standing at the sink. Turning and scrubbing her face, she stopped at the note. Hopefully, their landlord wasn't upping the rent. He'd raised it fifty dollars only six months ago.
She slid her finger in the fold and flattened the paper.
Thanks again for the pep talk and letting us be a family again — Kelli
A heaviness settled over her. Leaving the note for Peer, she went to the bedroom. She couldn't compete with the mother of his child.
She crawled into bed, knowing Peer had a key and could let himself in. Despite her body shutting down, her mind wouldn't stop thinking about the note, about Peer wanting to stay in Portland, about Kelli calling Tyr sweet face.
Was there anything left for her?
Feeling as if everyone she loved got ripped away from her or left her altogether, she sat up in bed. If she was smart, she'd let Kelli have her little family. She'd let Tyr have his real mom. She'd let Peer go, so he could live guilt-free, knowing he had done everything possible to raise his son right and honorably.
On a whim, she stood and turned on the light. Opening the dresser drawer, she shoved Peer's socks and underwear to the side and looked for the envelope she knew had to be there. Telling herself if the airline tickets were still there it was a sign that she should leave Peer to find his own happiness.
She could take her ticket and go to Norway. Distance and travel would help her get over Peer. The last thing she wanted to do was be here and watch Kelli take over her life, her man, her sweet face until she had nothing left.
Her fingers slid over the envelope. She pulled out the tickets and walked backward to the bed. Sitting down, she stared at the information. The plane would leave at eleven o'clock in the morning. It was almost three o'clock now.
Most of their things were stored away, waiting to be sent to Norway by Slag. They hadn't had time to retrieve everything and bring their possessions back home. But, she had clothes, and she had cash from her tips and access to her bank account. That's all she needed for an extended vacation.
The urge to run away before Peer could leave her for Kelli, she packed everything into a suitcase and put it in the coat closet by the front door. Then, she went to Tyr's room.
Being quiet, so she wouldn't wake him, she put her hand on his back.
"You won't even remember me, sweet face," she whispered. "But I'll remember you for the rest of my life. I hope deep down, you'll always believe someone loves you. That you're good enough. That you deserve love. Your pappa and mamma love you so much. You deserve all of that goodness."
She let her chin fall to the top of the crib rail. Tears coated her cheeks. She wasn't causing Tyr any hurt. It would be different if he was her son, but he had a mother. He had a father. He had everything a child needed. He was one of the lucky ones.
"Take care of your pappa for me," she whispered. "He's a good-good man."
Her sobs broke the silence. She tiptoed out of the room, afraid of waking Tyr and making him scared because she was crying.
She laid down in bed. When Peer got home, he'd believe she was asleep. Then, she'd leave before he got up.