Page 92 of The Darkest Hour

Killing Havoc would mean survival—no more threats, no more games of power and control.

No more. . .unwanted lust.

I shivered.

Do it.

With him dead, I could walk around this island, maybe even find a way to escape. But it would also mean crossing a line I wasn’t sure I could ever come back from.

I’ve killed so many times before. . .why is this one bothering me?

My gaze lingered on his face, twisted in pain even in unconsciousness.

He was a monster, no doubt, but I was a monster too.

The memories of his touch, his words, the knife tracing my skin, all came flooding back, igniting anger and desire within my body.

Stop it. Concentrate. What are you going to do?

Next, another emotion crept in, one I wasn’t ready to acknowledge but couldn’t ignore.

Loneliness.

I don’t want to be. . .alone here. . .

The thought slithered into my mind, completely unwelcome.

I had been fighting so hard to escape him, to break free from his control, but now that I had the chance to end it all, to be truly free, and. . .I found myself hesitating. Not because I feared killing him—no, I knew I could do it if I really wanted to—but because I wasn’t sure I wanted to be alone on this island for the rest of my godforsaken life.

Damn it.

The realization hit me like a punch to the gut, leaving me breathless.

What kind of twisted logic was this?

After everything he’d put me through, why would I even consider keeping him alive, let alone wanting him around?

But the truth was undeniable—the thought of being completely alone on this island terrified me almost as much as Havoc did.

For all his seducing cruelty, all his erotic manipulation, he was still a presence, still another human being in this desolate place. The thought of being the last person here, of wandering this island’s empty shores with nothing but my thoughts and memories, drowned me with dread.

Am I really fucking serious?

Sighing, I knelt beside him, studying his face, searching for some sign of humanity beneath the harsh exterior.

He was a monster, but he was also a man.

A man who had somehow become intertwined with my survival.

With my very existence on this island.

If I killed him, I’d be free from his threats.

His games.

His attempts to dominate me.

But I’d also be free from the only other living soul here.