Page 80 of Deck of Scarlets
“Why is she here?” I questioned angrily.
A puzzled expression tainted his face. “I’m not allowed to invite my girlfriend?”
“I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Then how did you mean it?” Josh crossed his arms over his chest, muscles flexing, every vein pulsating. His brown hair fanned his forehead, and those dark lashes fluttered every time he blinked. The jeans he wore hugged him perfectly, never leaving anything to the imagination.
I swallowed hard, trying to refocus on the conversation. “It’s not safe.”
He cocked an eyebrow and snorted back a laugh. “But with you, she is? We’re on the same mission here, Remi. What’s the difference between you and me?”
“She doesn’t know—”
“She won’t. I would never put her in danger like that. You honestly think that little of me?” His words sounded like a wounded puppy, and that left me embarrassed.
Did I? He knew more about this life than me, and that wasn’t by choice, but was I judging too quickly? He was my guardian, after all…
“Not answering makes it worse, you know.”
“You didn’t give me a chance.”
Tension increased in my shoulders as I tried my best not to lose my goddamn cool with him.
“Then please.” He gestured for me to continue, clearly amused by the conversation or lack thereof.
“This isn’t funny, so stop being an ass about this,” I retorted.
“Would you like me to repeat?” he asked condescendingly.
I clenched my fist, digging my nails into my palms, trying not to hit the smug look off his face. “No, Josh, but she’s my best friend. If anything happened to her, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.” The mere thought of something happening to Nickie, even Jeremy. A shudder went through my whole body. I didn’t care if our friendship was on the rocks. If she ever got hurt…
Josh’s eyes reflected an emotion I couldn’t detect as he pushed himself off the doorframe until we were inches apart. “Remi, I promise nothing will happen.” Unexpectedly, he brushed a loose strand from my face, tucking it neatly behind my ear.
“Don’t do that,” I whispered. One second, he was brutally cold, the next, his words and eyes lit me on fire from the inside out.
Realization crossed his face as he snapped his hand back. “I give you my word.”
“What if your word isn’t good enough?”
The room became too hot.
The sound of the doorknob turning had us jumping back from one another. Nickie’s head poked around, smiling like the Cheshire Cat. “There you both are!”
Suddenly, the door was kicked fully open by Chloe. “Come on, we’re playing beer pong, and you’re my partner, Watson.”
Josh gave me a curt nod, clearly not done with this conversation but done enough to drop it. Without a second thought, I pushed past him, feeling the brush of his fingers against my clenched fist, an electric tingle sparking a fire.
Only when I saw them together did my heart hammer, my pulse quicken, and the feeling of envy clouded my better judgment. I went feral with jealousy; I almost didn’t recognize myself. The more time spent with Josh, the more those emotions heightened, and I started to not like this version of myself. What led me to have these feelings? I honestly couldn’t understand myself. When distance separated us, it was easier to feel normal, but every time Josh entered a room or simply glanced at me, it was as if every rational thought I had went out the window. From the moment we bumped into each other at the club, all my logical thinking had crumpled. I tried my hardest to push it six feet under, but I would gladly suffocate myself to death only to feel the high of what he gave me.
At that moment, I knew I’d become the worst possible friend to Nickie; regardless of her safety, she had no idea I’d already created our path of destruction by letting my feelings for Josh get in the way, and I needed to stop it now. I couldn’t let years of friendship go down the drain over some guy who didn’t feel the same way.
Touching the last step, I felt an eerie sense of someone watching me. The hairs on my arms stood up with an unsettling chill creeping along my back as I scanned my surroundings. Everyone appeared to be enjoying themselves; nobody paid attention to the girl who monitored the crowd, trying to find something or someone who most likely wasn’t there. Chloe had already headed toward the kitchen when I eventually found the nerve to move again, but the uneasiness following me never left.
Entering the kitchen, Chloe somehow had a new partner, Baron, on one side of the table, and then there was Kal on the opposite end, using his pointer finger to signal to me to come over.
Great.
“What happened to Chloe being my partner?” I asked, taking the spot next to him.