Page 26 of Rock Strong
Yikes. “No, I’m just…amazed. Wow, that’s talent.” I hadn’t meant for it to come out sounding overly excited, but I was seriously in awe.
“It’s a piece I created for my audition for the New York Philharmonic in September,” she said, then stopped as if remembering she was supposed to be mad at me. “What do you want?” Her words were darts, tiny, sharp points pressed against my heart.
I took tentative, slow steps toward her. “Abby, I’m sorry.”
“For what?” she hissed. Ugh, the quintessential girl reply, the number two ranking answer when asked if everything was okay, after the number one I’m fine.
“Well…” I said, choosing my words carefully, “because yesterday we had a very nice conversation in the garden, and then last night, as you know, I didn’t follow through on finding you.”
“That’s correct,” she snarled. “Now, if you don’t mind, you can go suck it.”
I spit-laughed. “Abby”—I coughed, pounding my chest to bring air back into it—“listen, it gets crazy after a show. You have to learn this about us. You shouldn’t think anything of it. The mayhem is normal. It’s always pure chaos until I return to my room for the night.”
“When it starts to get even more interesting, I’m sure.” Her eyebrows did that thing they did when a girl doesn’t believe you and she’s waiting for you to redeem yourself.
“You think so?” I asked, hands on my hips. Two could play this game.
She gripped the neck of the cello hard. Her knuckles were white. “Well, you did have plenty of women to choose from. The Cream Team. All five were beautiful and surgically enhanced, so why not?”
“First of all…” I held up a finger. “None of them was beautiful. None. You, you’re beautiful, and that’s not horseshit. They were enhanced maybe, if you call fake body parts enhancement. Personally, I don’t see fake tits as an improvement. I’m more into natural breasts, if you must know.”
“I prefer not to.” She pursed her lips and returned to playing her song.
“Listen…Abby…” I fought for the right words. “I would have talked to you after the chaos died down, but I don’t have your number. We never exchanged. Why don’t you text me now, so I have it and this won’t happen again.”
“I don’t want you texting me.”
“Come on, you can’t mean that.”
“Well, I do. If you want to talk to me, I prefer you come see me. Texting is lame and lazy.”
That made me smile pretty fucking big. Here was this girl demanding to be treated with respect. Everyone else got texts. She wanted a physical visit. She was right, and I liked it. But there was more… “I really wanted to see you last night. I want you to know that.”
“You knew where to find me, Liam. Just like you knew where to send the flowers and wine back in LA, so I know you’re capable. Do me a favor. Just…stick to your porn stars and Orgy Room, and I’ll stick to my life, okay? It’s for the best.” Her eyes were pained and confused, brimming with tears I knew were betraying her more than I ever had.
I wanted to grab hold of her and explain what my life was like, how crazy it could get, even when I didn’t want it to be. “Don’t be like that. Listen, you’re the one who kissed me out of the blue yesterday. I wasn’t expecting that any more than you were.”
“You’re right. It was a mistake. Now go.” She started playing again.
She might’ve been pissed, but I wasn’t going to give up that easily. “Abby, I’m sorry. I said I was going to meet up with you after the show, and that’s what I should have done. The guys and I…we get into crazy shit after the show. Some of it is real, some is made up for the sake of interviewers and publicity to keep our reputation going.”
She listened. She didn’t shut me up or ask me to leave.
“I wasn’t sure how I felt about you before that kiss. But I want you to know, I talked to two of my friends just to try to figure it out.”
She stopped playing and looked at me. There was genuine interest in her eyes.
“But after the kiss in the garden…I knew what I was feeling, and I’ll be honest here…it scared me. There’s…stuff…in my past. When I saw you watching us after the show, and I knew you’d heard…I knew you’d seen…I felt guilty. And that bothered me. I haven’t had to worry how my actions affected someone else for a long time.”
She shrugged. “If it scares you so much, you don’t have to worry about your actions affecting me.” For a moment, she continued to look hard at me, then her expression softened slightly. She bit her lip and sighed. “Look, you’re right. I kissed you. And even though you were the one who said you’d find me, you didn’t make me promises beyond that.”
“What if I want to make you promises?”
She shook her head and smiled sadly. “You can’t blow me off, tell me you don’t want to be responsible for someone else’s feelings, then tell me you want to make me promises, Liam. That’s not logical.”
I clasped my hands around the back of my neck and contemplated the ceiling before releasing a deep breath and dropping my arms. “I know. I’m confused. But one thing that’s not confusing is how attracted I am to you. You have to believe me.”
“I do. Because I’m attracted to you, too. And I’m just as confused as you are. The truth is, I want you, Liam, but I’m not sure I should.” She waved her bow around slightly. “You live in a strange world. With strange people around you constantly, temptation around you constantly. There’s no room to breathe, let alone figure out what we could be to each other. So while I was mad, I understand why you didn’t come find me last night. Let’s just—”