Page 24 of Ice Cold Hearts
“Not at all.” I shake my head. “Every dynamic is different, and it’s a rare woman who can capture the attention of all three of us. Try thinking about it like the scientific method, if it helps. The method stays the same, but the experiments are different.”
She nods encouragingly. “I’ll try. Go on.”
“Part of what we were too distracted to tell you about the four of us being…” I pause for a moment as I search for the right word.
“Involved?” Emily suggests.
“Sure, involved,” I say, grateful she’s willing to listen. “When the three of us are involved with a woman, it doesn’t always have to be all four of us together like when we were in the stairwell. It’s usually that way, but life happens and we’re all different people. We want you to have relationships with us separately as well as us all together. When we say you don’t have to choose, we mean it, so there’s no need for guilt.”
Alexei clears his throat aggressively, so I take the hint and get to the point faster.
“What I’m trying to say is that I’m not going to care if you spend time with just Alexei or just Oliver, and they’re not going to care if you spend time with just me or with any possible combination of the two of us. We’re all adults here. If one of us is feeling neglected, we’ll tell you. I hope we never make you feel neglected.” I smile. “But we expect you to tell us if something is bothering you, especially if you’re dealing with guilt or uncertainty. I know I’m probably beating a dead horse, but whatever happened in the limo with Alexei is only important if you didn’t like it. When it’s one of us, two of us, or all three of us, there’s absolutely nothing to be guilty about. The only real rule we have is that if you agree to be with us, it’s only us, just like it’ll only be you.”
“I’m not sure what to say,” she says, fiddling with the zipper of her jacket.
“It’s not a marriage proposal,” I start.
“Yet,” Oliver interrupts with a grin.
“Not helping,” Alexei growls.
“Emily,” I say, savoring the taste of her name on my lips, “you’re in control of how far this does or doesn’t go, whether it’s one night, a couple of months, or years, but for however long you want this, I promise it’ll just be the four of us. I’m sorry we rushed into it without saying all this first, but that’s all our cards on the table. So, what do you say to starting our date over?”
8
EMILY
Ilook between the three men who are waiting on pins and needles for my answer but desperately trying to hide it. Alexei’s dark, brooding features are a study of forced neutrality, but the tightness in his jaw gives him away. Oliver looks relaxed. The corners of his mouth are slightly turned up in a smile, but his eyes are wrong. They're opened a little too wide and his eyebrows are just a little too high. He’s overcompensating in an attempt to appear unfazed. And Ian? He’s the worst of the lot at hiding it. He’s looking at me like he’s never going to see me again.
It's clear that the only choice left to be made is mine. I barely know them, but I've already started becoming attached. Something about them draws me in like a moth to the proverbial flame.
What if I do get drawn in and all I'm left with on the other side is a pile of ashes? There are a million reasons to say no. They're stupid famous. That means I'll have to deal with the press and the fans if this goes beyond tonight. Beyond the obvious security concerns and potential backlash over our unconventional relationship, there's my heart to consider. It would be all too easy for me to fall in love with them. Could my heart stand being broken not just once, but three times if this ends in disaster?
The biggest problem is Audrey. There's no way Oliver won't find out. Hell, I made a teddy bear for her from the tee shirt I took from him that night so she'd have a tangible part of her father. It's game over when he sees that. If I do this, I'll have to tell him, but when would I do that? Now? After things get serious? What if he hates me forever and tries to take her away from me? With how much money he has, I would have no chance in court.
Let's not take a hard left turn into Crazy Town.
I count to ten in my head.
Rationally, I'm aware he wouldn't do anything like that, especially since he's always traveling for games. I do want Audrey to have a father who's present in her life. It would be hard, but we could adjust to split custody if this doesn't work out.
Doesn't work out? Girl, you're still deciding whether you even want to continue this date. That white dress has gone to your head.
Realistically, it's just a matter of when to tell them and working up the courage to do it. I still have time to decide when, and where, and how. Tonight’s not the night to make those plans.
I take another hard look at the men seated around the table. Could I really walk away from them without even seeing if this could work? Would I be able to do without all the messages from them that brighten my day? How could I go back to just my vibrator after the mind-blowing orgasms Alexei gave me earlier this evening?
I take a deep breath. “I have a few conditions.”
“Name it,” Alexei commands.
“If you continue to see me for physical therapy, there is to be absolutely no nonsense during treatment. No flirting. No teasing. No nothing,” I tell them.
They silently communicate through glances, and in that moment I understand exactly how they’re so good on the ice. It’s their own private language. I wonder if I’ll get to be with them long enough to learn it.
“Understood,” Alexei says.
Oliver and Ian nod their assent.