Page 127 of Scourged

She blinked, taking stock of her body. He stood close to her—far too close—but he’d let go of her wrist, both hands hanging loosely by his sides.

The only places they touched were where her dagger met his throat … and where her left hand had wrapped around the back of his neck, her fingers winding into the messy lengths of his hair.

She released him with a gasp, stumbling back. Her chest heaved, everything buzzing in her ears, lightning whipping across her skin. Threads of magic crackled and popped, silver and gold sparking off her fingers. Heat flared in his eyes as she fought to control herself.

Fought … and failed.

“I could … feel you,” she repeated, her words a hoarse whisper. Everything was too bright, too dark, too much.

“Felt what, princess?” He took a small, hesitant step forward. His eyes, burning even brighter, dropped to her lips. “Use your words.”

Mariah knew her flush deepened. She couldn’t stop it. Couldn’t even try.

She gritted her teeth. “You. I could—can—feelyou. Gods, it’s like you’ve burrowed under my skin, and I can’t fucking shut you out.”

He cocked his head. “You can shut the others out?”

She nodded.

“But you can’t shut me out.” A slow grin spread across his face.

A muscle in her jaw tightened, but she didn’t answer him.

“Can you feel this?” His voice was husky, but he held his grin as he lifted his hand and laid it across his chest. “Can you feel the way everything in me aches for you? What your presence here, right now, does to me?”

Gods, she could. That bridge between them was so bright; she could see it when she closed her eyes, pulsing and shimmering. Everything he felt, every feeling and desire he harbored for her, crashed down their bond, slamming into her with so much force she worried it might buckle her knees and slam her to the ground.

She closed her eyes. Forced herself to breathe deep, searching inhales and expelling exhales. Not that it helped. Nothing helped.

But she had to try. Deep inside her, somewhere, buried beneath layers and layers of lust and desire and heat, was pain. Distrust. Insecurities she was working to repair but weren’t yet mended.

Mariah was terrified of what might happen if she gave in. How much it might shake loose all those things she’d buried.

She was also terrified of what would happen if she forced herself to walk away. To return to her rooms, alone and heated. What that sort of crash might do to her.

Gods, what a fucking mess.

She cracked her eyes, her lids heavy, to find that Andrian had inched closer, and now stood so near that she could still feel his heat radiating off him in waves. He panted, his hands shaking, his eyes whirlpools and his shadows curling around his shoulders.

A dam was broken when she met his gaze.

“Do you know what I had to see back in that place? What I had to endure?”

A shadow flickered across his face. “Mariah, I … I would trade everything about myself to go back in time. Just the thought that I was the one who hurt you like that … those scars?—”

“Not the fucking scars.” Her fury twined with her aching need, washing through her so she didn’t know where one ended and the other began. “Her.”

This time, it was confusion that passed over him. “Her? Who are you talking about?”

She gritted her teeth, still lost to herself. “I could survive the whips and starvation. Bodies heal. But do you know what truly broke me?” He blurred, and she angrily wiped away her tears.

“When I had to see you kiss another woman. I was holding on, until they convinced me—for one fleeting, horrible moment—that everything you’d ever told me was alie.”

Mariah didn’t just see the horror spreading across his face. She could feel it, couldtasteit, thick and slimy and bitter as it washed down that infuriatingly beautiful bond. Andrian’s stunning eyes widened as his jaw slackened, taking a staggering step back.

“I … Mariah, I have no memories of that place. I don’t even know who you could be talking about. I would … I wouldnever.” His voice cracked at the end. “I know—I know I said some terrible things to you. Before. In the library, on that balcony. But they were just the words of a scared and desperate man. The moment you stepped out of that carriage, you were it for me. Even if this world lost its moons, you would still be mine.”

Everything in Mariah’s world narrowed to this moment. This confrontation.