Page 88 of For the Cameras

Had fun last night. Sorry I fell asleep on the couch, but hope you have a good morning. See you soon.

-Chase

I rubbed my palm over my eyes, still trying to blink away the sleep.

It wasn’t exactly thewarmestnote I’d ever read, but it was nice that Chase thought to leave one at all.

Because he doesn’t owe you anything,I reminded myself.

I got up, showered, and grabbed a protein bar from my makeshift cabinet-pantry at the side of the kitchen. I knew I wasn’t going to be needed for any of the renovation filming today, so I could throw myself into my work upstairs or even head into the office if I wanted to.

I had to focus on something other than last night.

And, actually, I had a pretty good idea of what I could do to truly get my mind off of things and take care of the morning wood that appeared without warning under my pants.

I headed upstairs, knowing I only had a short window of time to take care of it. I forgot about all of the lighting and camera tipsand went back into my default mode, just grabbing my phone camera and pointing it at myself.

I sat down on the edge of my bed and hit record, gripping my cock and stroking it for the video.

“This is for you,” I said without thinking.

When the camera was recording me, I became… myself. Not the guy who fumbled socially, who never knew what to say, who was a shy wallflower who’d rather be alone.

In my videos, it didn’t matter. I said what I wanted. And this morning, I knew what I wanted to say.

“I had dreams about you, all night,” I murmured as I filmed my cock. I was already throbbing, and it was a good thing I needed to be quick because I wasgoingto be quick, whether I liked it or not. “Nobody gets me hard like you do.”

Images of Chase filled my mind, unbidden. I didn’t want to think about him in particular, but all I could imagine was the feeling of his body pressed up near mine. The feeling of his lips on me.

“You know this cock is yours, whenever you want it. And you know I wish this was your lips wrapped around it.Fuck, you would be so perfect. I’m going to come for you. I’m yours—”

I broke off as I came quicker than I ever had for a video. I would have been embarrassed if I hadn’t been so damn turned on.

It had been better when I’d recorded with him, though.

I didn’t want to admit it. I didn’t want to imagine a life where he disappeared from my world, the moment my kitchen renovations were over.

But I didn’t know what other future there could be.

I stopped recording and lay back on my bed for a few breaths, listening to the faint sound of the birds chirping up a storm outside my balcony doors, coming back down to Earth.I hopped in the shower and quickly washed up before heading back downstairs.

When I checked my phone again, I realized I had notifications from the morning that I’d never looked at.

I scrolled through to see texts from Chase, from earlier this morning.

Chase Blau: Ignore that note I left you. I’m at the coffee shop, do you want anything? I could bring it back.

Chase Blau: …Aaaand, ignore that last text. I won’t bug you, you seemed like you needed sleep.

Chase Blau: Last night really was fun. When can we film again? Filming with you was the most fun I’ve had in a long time.

Chase Blau: Honestly, everything I do with you is more fun than anything I do without you.

There was a gap in time of about forty-five minutes between those texts and the next one:

Chase Blau: Ignore all those texts. I’ll see you when we come over to film in a bit.

Chase Blau: Or maybe not, if you’re working. I’m not trying to say you have to be home, or anything. Christ, I am texting you too much.