Page 42 of Ex Marks the Spot
Go to the AJ Hackett Bungy Center and board a bus to Nevis Playground,
where you will hurl yourself off a stationary object and plunge head-first to the ground. If your tiny rubber band doesn’t break and you survive, you will receive your next clue.
An invisible vise squeezes my chest, making it almost impossible to breathe or think or remain upright. To avoid footage of me passing out on the sidewalk, I zombie-walk to a nearby bench and collapse onto it.
Sighing, Court follows and crosses his arms. “What are you doing?”
“Trying not to have a heart attack.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I can’t do this.”
“Weren’t you the one who made a big deal about doing the next solo challenge?”
“Yeah, but I didn’t think there’d be any bungee jumping this season since they did it last season in Africa. I don’t even know how much life insurance I have. And how do they get bodies back to the US? Would they embalm me first or send me in one of those refrigerated boxes? And why does New Zealand spell bungee differently?”
Court wholly ignores my panic in favor of checking his watch and counting on his fingers. “We started with an equalizer, and we only know for sure that we’re ahead of the Niles and Old Bay. We can’t afford a three-hour penalty if we switch, nor can we afford to waste more time while you relax on a bench.”
“Clearly, I’m not relaxing,” I say, sweeping a sweaty hand over my borderline-hyperventilating body.
“But youarewasting time. You can fall apart in a taxi on the way there.” He hoists me up by my backpack strap and practically drags me to the curb.
“Your compassion and ability to encourage others are astounding. If your career at the chop shop doesn’t pan out, you should get into motivational speaking.”
In case you think I’m acting like a baby, allow me to present the following:
The personal information card they give you at check-in is called a “customer toe tag.”
The bus driver played a song called “We’re All Going to Die” on our drive up to the platform.
Said platform (you know, the one in which I’ll jump to my death) is an enclosed metal-and-glass pod that has been SUSPENDED BETWEEN TWO MOUNTAINS in the Southern Alps. As in, I’ll be dangling over the Nevis River while I’m connected to something that’s also dangling over the river.
Oh! And the only way out to the platform is via a cable car, which means...
So.
Much.
Dangling.
AND.
They don’t even give you a helmet. Probably because literally nothing will save me, so why waste money on extraneous equipment?
“Hartley!” Kennedy shouts as her cable car approaches the last piece of solid ground I’ll ever stand on. A staff member unlocks the gate and unclips their carabiners from the safety cable so Kennedy, Mitchell, and their crew can exit.