Page 53 of Axel

“Bitch,” she muttered. “You don’t have to rub it in.”

“I don’t think you did anything stupid.” Marcia spoke up, dark brown eyes twinkling as she lifted a hand for the bartender to bring them more drinks. “I think it’s wonderful.”

Ellie gave her a cutting look. “What’s so wonderful about being dumped?”

“Honey, you are in love. Yes, it sucks wide that the idiot man just up and left without a word. But that’s men for you. They are never known to be brightest bulb in the box.

But, if you did not mean anything to him, he would not have felt the need to do a vanishing act. Ah, thanks Brian.” She smiled at the man who brought over the drink. Waiting until he left, she continued. “This trip you are planning might be just the wake up call he needs.”

Ellie shook her head and automatically reached for her rum and coke. “He won’t know. His mother and sister have been keeping in touch, but I am going to cut off communications. It’s too painful to talk to them. I certainly don’t need any reminders of him and it’s going to make it difficult for me to move on.”

“Can you?” Marcia asked her bluntly.

“I have been trying to forget.”

“You are in love with the guy honey. Cut yourself some slack. It’s not an emotion that’s going to just disappear as if it’s the common cold.”

“I wish it was. I keep hoping that I would wake up one morning and I no longer feel the awful yearning for him,” she admitted wryly.

“What if you are pregnant?” Jackie burst out. “You said that you had sex without using anything. It’s not like you to be soirresponsible or were you hoping you could use a baby to trap him into marrying you?”

Ellie and Marcia stared at her in shock.

“You know me better than that. What the hell is your problem?”

Jackie collapsed back against the chair, her expression mutinous and weary. “I am sorry.”

Pushing her drink aside, she clasped her hands together on the tabletop. “I am projecting. Paul is filing for a divorce. He said it’s not working for him anymore and he has met someone else. He also wants custody of the children.” Her hands trembled as she reached for her drink.

There was silence around the table for a minute before Ellie reached out and took her hand. “I am so sorry.”

Jackie nodded. “I saw it coming, but buried my head in the sand, refusing to believe it was happening. We were not happy. I doubt we ever were.” She shook her head. “The sad part of it is, I don’t know if I am going to fight him for custody.

We got married too soon. I was pregnant and it seemed like the right thing to do.” Tears gathered in her eyes, and she had to blink them away. She squeezed Ellie’s hand. “I envy you your fairytale affair honey and that was jealousy speaking.”

“You are forgiven.” Ellie told her huskily, her own problems diminishing. “But think about this very carefully and get a damn good lawyer.”

“I agree with Ellie. Those children are yours as much as his and he has no right trying to take them from you.”

“He says that all I do is work and he is probably right. He told me that he is the one who is always there for them.”

“Wasn’t that the damn arrangement?” Ellie demanded; her anger apparent. “He would stay home, and you go out and work? Now he is trying to use that against you?”

Jackie laughed bitterly. Taking another sip of her drink, she trailed a finger over the condensation on the glass. “The irony of it is, now he wants to work. The woman he met is some sort of executive and has her own company. They have been seeing each other for months now and as soon as the divorce is final, they are getting married.”

“That soulless bastard!” Marcia hissed. “Honey, I am advising you to fight dirty. I know a damn good lawyer and I am going to ask him if he can take your case pro bono. You are not going to roll over and play dead. Not on my watch.”

“Or mine, either.” Ellie added.

*****

Later that night when she got home, Ellie sat on the loveseat in the corner of the room, her legs curled beneath her as she stared at the TV.

A romcom was showing, but she had muted the sound and was not really paying attention to the couple holding hands and splashing through a lovely stream. Her mind was not on the movie, she had just turned the TV on for some ambient light.

She felt sorry for Jackie, but her friend had admitted that she had never been in love with her husband. She herself could never countenance being with a man permanently without being in love with him.

Human beings were simply hard to live with in the first place and when there is no sort of emotional attachment it makes matters more complicated. But now she was in love, and it made her want to run around and scream in frustration.