Page 84 of Rule Breaker
Maddox was okay fucking around, but as soon as I invited him here, boom. Everything imploded. I’d asked him to come home with me again the day we were leaving campus. We argued in the dorm, and he stormed off. Dane told me that maybe I was better off leaving Maddox alone. I was starting to wonder if he was right.
And yet, it was too late. I already knew I wanted more than a quick make-out session with Maddox here and there. I wanted to be with him all the time. And yeah, I still wanted him to fuck me. I’d even ordered that dildo and started experimenting. I was more than ready for it. For him. For all of it. There was an idea in my head, a ridiculous one, that me and Maddox were like Dane and Jackson. We could be boyfriends. Fuck, just saying the word gave me chills. I’d had a crush or two on girls in high school, but nothing, nothing like this. I was in over my head but I didn’t know what to do.
“I can’t believe that. And if so, it’s their loss,” Mom replied, and patted my hand.
“It’s complicated.”
“It shouldn’t be. Either she likes you, or she doesn’t.”
“He doesn’t!” I blurted out and slammed my fork down.
Suddenly, the entire table quieted. Fuck.Way to go Kay.Can’t do anything the normal way.
“Did you sayhe?” Mom asked.
“Uh, well, I mean—” I paused, my face burning hot. “Yes.”
Dad leaned forward. “What’s going on?”
I stared at him across the table. My dad’s a giant bear of a man and I get my size, and my hazel eyes, from him. Mom’s only five-six and petite. But of the two of them, mom’s the one who’s fiercely protective, the one who enforced the rules in the house. Dad had a more laid-back approach to parenting. I had a feeling that was about to change. And given the way he was staring at me, it was happening right this fucking minute.
“I fell for someone,” I confessed. “A guy on my hockey team. I’m bi. Merry Christmas!”
Oh, my god. I actually said all that out loud.
Everyone at the table stared at me.
“What?”
“You’ve got it bad for one of your teammates?” my sister Janina yelled out. “That’s so hot.”
“Nina!” Mom called out.
“What? Tell us his name! Show us his picture!” Nina insisted.
I bit back a laugh and then I realized there was nothing funny about this situation. I had it bad for Maddox, but the reverse wasn’t true.
“I don’t have a picture. Maddox—” I paused, remembering that neither of us was planning to come out. Shit. Not that anyone in my family would say a word. And I knew Nina wouldhound me until she got the truth. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything. Don’t repeat his name.”
My younger sisters, Reena and Jenna, pulled out their phones.
“I’m googling him,” Reena announced as she and Jenna giggled.
Oh Jesus. Me and my big fucking mouth.
My dad tapped the table. “A teammate?”
“It just happened.”
“Are you out of your mind?” My dad barked. “You’re under the radar of professional league scouts. If it comes out that you’ve been…involved with your teammate, forget your chances of ever playing at that level!”
“Vic,” Mom whispered to my dad and reached for his hand. “Calm down.”
“Calm down? Do you want our son to screw up his entire future for some guy?”
“He’s not some guy. His name is Maddox,” I countered. “Look, there’s nothing to worry about. He’s not interested in me, so there’s no problem. Okay? Can we forget I said anything and go back to our usual Christmas food coma?”
“Why didn’t you tell us you were gay?” my brother Alec asked.