Page 19 of Menage a Passions
“You’re kidding.” Jane showed neither disgust nor excitement over Caitlyn’s recent news. “A national pageant? For married women? I didn’t know there was such a thing.”
“There are a few. Mrs. America, Mrs. United States, Mrs. USA…”
“Right, right, and they have them for the kiddies, too.”
“Well, yes. I made it to the finals of Young Teen America, you know.”
“Brilliant for you, Cait. I’m sure I have seen the pictures.”
Caitlyn scrunched her nose at her wife’s flippant tone. “Izzy – you remember her, I’m sure, she was at our first wedding – thinks I have a decent shot of representing Iowa in the wake of their scandal.”
Jane didn’t ask how Caitlyn could qualify for representing a state she didn’t technically live in, but she probably didn’t knowwhyshe should ask. “You want to do this, love? Be in a pageant again?”
Caitlyn sipped her ice water. “I don’t know. That’s why I’m talking to you about it. Izzy has made it clear I probably don’thave a real shot at winning, but it’s not about that. I just… I kind of miss it, you know. Maybe there’s a part of me that wonders if I’ve still got ‘it.’ Back when I was a pageant princess, it was a big deal to be my size. You didn’t have women like Denise Bidot, and Ashley Graham hadn’t hit the national consciousness yet. I had to fight for every place I took on a stage. And no one ever let me forget that if I won, let alone hit runner-up on a national stage, it wasdespiteme being ‘fat.’ But I’ll admit the blond hair and great skin have always helped.”
Jane blinked as if her brain was buzzing a mile a minute, and it probably was. God knew Caitlyn had announced things that Jane could barely keep up with. “Bloody bonkers to me that anyone would callyoufat, Cait. You are a bigger woman, and God knows I love it, but you take such good care of yourself. Ugh! I am the one who needs to eat more. How many years now have you been telling me to eat more than a grapefruit for breakfast?”
“That’s Becca telling you that. And your dentist. He shits on your grapefruit breakfasts.”
“My point is that as far as I am concerned, you are the epitome of classic American beauty. You turned on the telly in Hong Kong in 1990 and were bombarded with curvy Hollywood vixens like Pamela Anderson or whoever.”
“Pamela Anderson? Suppose she is considered quite curvy in Hong Kong.”
“You know what I mean. Hong Kong had its beauty standards for natives, as every woman in my family can attest, but remember how people used to openly stare at you when we lived there? They had not seen such a beautiful woman before!”
“Let alone one as pale and starkly white as me.” Caitlyn shuddered. She had a memory book full of the times when local Hong Kongers – and Beijingers, Seoulites, and Tokyoites – all touched her skin and hair without permission, but it wasn’t thesame as always being reminded that she washugecompared to the slim, lithe bodies that local fashion catered to.Worse than hip-huggers in the early 2000s.Those had been dark times for Caitlyn. She’d take the current trend of crop tops any day, as long as she could wear high-waisted leggings and jeans.
“How long will this pageant thing take?” Jane asked, changing the subject.
“It’s in November. Assuming I don’t win, that’s when it ends.”
“That is soon. Only a couple of months.”
“Yes, most women have been training for it since earlier this year.”
“It’s not like you cannot remember how to wear a bikini or interview like a champ. Or whatever they make you do at those things.” Jane pulled a tin of mints out of her jacket pocket and chewed on one while waiting for her food. “Just use your personal funds to pay for whatever and it should be fine.”
“So… you think I should do it?”
“Don’t you want to, love? Sounds like you do.”
Caitlyn hadn’t expected this conversation to go this way. While she knew Jane would not be outright mortified by the thought, surely, there would be scheduling conflicts and Caitlyn being gone for weeks at a time.Now we have Cecelia to look after, and…Assuming Becca came along for some of Caitlyn’s fun, Jane would be on her own with a teenager. Nobody in the family knew how that might go.
“Cait.” Jane took her hand on the table. “I love you. You are brilliant. You are gorgeous. You go with me like jam on toast and I am the burnt toast.”
“Come on, Jane…”
“I’m serious! In terms of beauty, what do I bring to the table besides a flat arse and a lack of arm hair?”
“It is pretty wild how you don’t have any arm hair…”
“I am not trying to put myself down by saying this, but I am in a relationship with not only one buttwobloody beautiful women who make me thank God every day that they put up with my stupid, sarcastic arse because God knows I do not deserve either of you. But especially you, Cait. You are the epitome of a woman anyone would kill to have as theirs. I don’t know what has been going on lately that you have been so down on your appearance, but I wantyouto know that I am going to keep thinking you are the most gorgeous creature since Aphrodite herself and I do not even care if Becca heard me say that because she would agree with me!”
Caitlyn allowed a small smile to show itself. “Thank you, Lin. I love you, too.”
“God knows why!”
Their hands squeezed together. “Because you say sweet things like that.”