Page 136 of Reverie

My thoughts spin and spin and all of this is too fucking much.

“I want all of it, H,” she whispers and brings her lips to my cheek. “You think your darkness will scare me away. But the truth is, I want your dark, your light, and your in-between. Because you’re it for me. I love you completely. Transcendentally.”

She echoes the same words I’ve shared with her over and over.

“Okay,” I whisper. I move to kiss her forehead, bringing her even closer—wishing I could absorb her into me. “Let’s make a deal, then.”

She pulls back from me and raises her eyebrow. “A deal?”

I rub her arms. “Yes,” I say, the idea formulating quickly in my brain.

There’s so much there in her gaze, and I know that there’s so much more I need to tell her. There’s so much more we need to discuss and so much more trust to rebuild.

But right now, all I know is that the next right thing to do is this: I kneel before her, gazing into her eyes and holding both of her hands.

“Winter Leigh Vaughan, will you marry me?”

She’s dumbstruck for several moments, her eyes wide and her mouth open. Then her face turns sad.

“I…I thought you said Paris would be…” She stops talking and stares past me and to the art piece hanging on the wall.

“Yes, I did say that,” I reply. I said that before the world exploded. “I want to give you that. More than anything I want to give you that. But I can’t wait any longer.Wecan’t wait any longer. And if we’re going to face this shit down together, I want to do it with you by my side as my wife. I love you, Winter.”

I kiss her hands, clutching them in mine.

“I never expected you. I never dared to hope that I could find someone that I love as much as you. Or that I’d find someone who loves me as much as you do.”

She bites her trembling lip, and I’m not sure she’s aware that she’s crying.

“Please, baby, I hate to see your tears,” I say. I stand, wiping her cheek.

“Hunter…” she says on a breath. She grips my wrist, keeping my palm to her cheek.

“I know that I’m a broken, broken man. I know that I’ve hurt you.” My voice catches, and I try my damndest not to think about that fucking bathroom or the sight of her collapsing on the tile.

“I have so much to atone for with you and August and so many other people. I know that this isn’t what you dreamed of or what you deserve, but if there’s anything I want on this planet, it’s to be one with you in every single way that I can.”

This is such a far cry from the image I’d spun for her—us at the top of the Eiffel Tower with my mother’s ring in my hand.

I don’t even have a ring—I left my mother’s ring, the diamond that was last on Blair’s corpse, with Misha.

But if this is all that we have, I want to give her all of it.

Winter pulls me away from her face, but instead of stepping back, she leans into me, wrapping me in a tight embrace.

After several thuds of my heart racing against my breastbone, she lifts her head.

And smiles.

NINETEEN

WINTER

As the sun falls past the government buildings across the Basin on a summer afternoon three days later, I hold hands with Hunter James Brigham and take him as my husband.

The cherry blossom trees are barren of the buds I love so much, and there aren’t as many people here as I’d expect.

Hunter’s hands are cool against my sweaty palms, and I’m grateful for the light breeze that kicks up my skirt near my ankles.