Page 109 of Fierce-Dane
“No,” she said, putting her head on his shoulder. Not a move she’d done before either and he had some hope she was opening up more with him. “I’d never do that with sex. I just think we need to talk. My life is a mess. I joked I had more drama than you and now it’s really true. I don’t know that you signed up for this and wanted you to know that I’d understand if you needed time to figure it out.”
“Stop right there,” he said. “I’m not a wuss. I’m not so weak that I will leave when the going gets tough and I’m not sure where in your brain you think that.”
“I don’t,” she said. “And I know I insulted you and it wasn’t my intention.”
“You did insult me, but I’m not going to hold it against you. And I’m not going to walk away from you when you’re going through something hard. Do you think I would have let my sister take Tiffani to your spa to see you days ago if that was my intention?”
She just stared at him. “I guess I didn’t think that way. I’m all over the place right now.”
“Don’t be,” he said. He pulled her close and under hisarm. His pants had been fastened, but his shirt was still unbuttoned and open and hanging out.
He’d never felt like a cocky person or lover before, but sitting like this and knowing she’d all but attacked him when the door opened fed his ego a big juicy steak.
“I’m sorry,” she said.
“Don’t be sorry either,” he said. He wasn’t sure if this was the time to say what he was feeling but then wondered when would be the right time. “I wasn’t sure I could ever love another woman again. I wasn’t sure I had it in me or even wanted to.”
“You don’t need to tell me this,” she said.
“Does that mean you don’t want to hear it because you don’t feel the same way?” he asked. His heart was pounding more than it was minutes ago with what they were doing on her couch.
“It means I don’t want you to feel as if you have to tell me this to make me feel better.”
“Maybe I want to make myself feel better because I’m sick of holding it in. I’m not walking away from you, Sloane. I love you and I want to be there for you. I want to help you through this as much as I want you to help me through the next phase in my life. You’ve been doing it for a few months and I know even with everything going on in your life, just being with you will have it continue.”
Her eyes got a little teary. “I don’t know what might have been the right words if someone asked me, but it was them after I heard it. I’ve never been in love with anyone before. I often wonder if I even loved my mother the way I should have. Life was just...difficult and different. But what I feel for you is so intense. The man you are, the way you approach things in life. The changes you’ve made though I don’t notice them that much. Everything about you makes yousuch an easy man to love. I’m glad it’s me who gets to do it. I love you too, Dane.”
He hugged her tight and kissed her forehead. “And that is what you do when you love someone. You say all the right things even when you’re both feeling unsure. We’ll get through this together. We’ll figure it out. Don’t worry about me if we go days without seeing each other. We already were. Shiloh knows about me. I’ve spent the night twice with her around. I can come here no problem when it works.”
But he wanted her to start staying at his house too. It wouldn’t be too much to have Shiloh stay in his spare room. He wouldn’t have her stay in Tiffani’s. That didn’t feel right to him even if his daughter had bunk beds. Both kids did so they could have friends stay over.
They weren’t even close to being there.
“That is probably how it will be for nights now,” she said. “I just need to put one foot in front of the other and get through this parent-teacher conference.”
“Do you want me to go with you? I can but am not sure you need me for anything more than moral support.”
“I’ll be fine. I’m sure I’ll be calling you later to find out if I should have asked or said anything.”
“Start out saying this is all new to you,” he said. “Be completely honest. It helps. They will be helpful and understanding. Say Shiloh comes first and you are setting up counseling for her at Duke.”
He’d sent the referral in already and it was being processed.
“I’m not used to being so open like that. Of showing any weaknesses.”
“It’s not a weakness to admit you don’t have it all together, Sloane. I’m finally learning that.”
32
NEW DYNAMIC
“But you said she didn’t have any kids,” Tiffani said, pouting. “You lied to me.”
He let out a sigh. “I didn’t lie to you. She doesn’t have kids. This is her sister. And I told you what is going on and why Shiloh now lives with Sloane.”
He’d wanted his kids to spend some time with Sloane after he’d heard how well it went when Tiffani got her pedicure three weeks ago, but this was the first Saturday he had them.
Shiloh seemed to be struggling to make friends and he thought it’d be nice if his kids could talk to her. Maybe get her to relax a little around them. Give her a confidence boost she might need that neither he nor Sloane could manage.