Page 119 of The Way We Play
“By yourself?” My brow furrows.
The guys filter in from the pool area, and Logan goes to Dylan, tugging her ponytail so he can kiss her forehead.
“Still going?” he asks.
“Girls’ night has concluded. We’re just cleaning up, and trying to figure out how to get Allie home.” Dylan says it looking straight at Jack, and Allie’s eyes widen as she glares at our friend.
“I can take you. I’ve got to drive home.”
“Haven’t you been drinking?” Allie’s voice is flustered.
“I only had one beer. I’m good.” Jack smiles, and her cheeks flush. “Just have to grab Kimmie.”
She nods, and they start for the door. The food is all packed up, and Logan follows Dylan to the kitchen, where she’ll put the platters in the industrial sized dishwasher. My throat tightens, because they all left me here with him.
Zane stands beside the bar facing me, and I’m still buzzy, even though I’ve drunk an entire bottle of water and eaten one million toasts. I need to get to bed, but what I want more than anything is him. My emotions are all over the place.
I’m mad at him, but it’s because I miss him. I want to be wrapped in his strong arms, in that comforting place where I fit like a lost puzzle piece finally found.
“Ready to walk back?” His quiet voice is warm liquid in my veins.
My eyes flutter shut, and I shake my head no. “I’m not walking back with you.”
He exhales, looking at the large windows, which are usually open to catch the bay breezes. Tonight they’re closed, and raindrops cling to the glass.
“We’re going to the same place, Rachel.”
“No, we’re not.” My eyes flash, and that stubborn survival streak rises in my chest. “I’m going to a place where men don’t walk away from the good right in front of them because it’s not perfect.”
“Rachel…”
He takes a step towards me, but I take off for the door. I’m practically running when I push through it, and the rain hits my face in big drops. It’s cold rain, and I can feel where it mixes with the hot tears on my cheeks.
Blinking through the moisture, I look for the lights on the ground, lining the path to the house in the darkness. I’m not running, and I hear his voice.
“Rachel…”
“Leave me alone.” I pick up the pace.
“I need to talk to you.” He reaches for me, trying to pull me into his arms, but I won’t let him.
“I don’t want to talk to you.” I wave my hands, preventing his strong arms from surrounding me. “So many things are broken, but I have to believe I can make them better. I want something better, and I won’t let you hurt me again.”
“I never want to hurt you?—”
“I know, you only want to keep me safe.”
“Look at me.”
The rain is coming down harder, and I blink up to his tortured blue eyes. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Rachel. I’m sorry for running. I want to make it up to you. I want to give you everything you deserve.” Reaching out, he pulls me into his arms, close against his chest. “Let me show you.”
My body shudders, and tears warm my cheeks. “What do I deserve?”
“Everything.” He kisses away my tears. “You deserve every beautiful thing, my beautiful girl. You’re smart and strong and funny and sweet. You take all my pain away, and you help me remember how to play. You make me remember what I was like before the darkness came.”
“What are you saying?”
“Don’t you see?” He slides the cold rain off my face with his hand. “I love you, Rachel. I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you. You’re my light.”