Page 91 of Lessons In Grey

I hung the lights up everywhere, having to borrow a ladder from Jerry in order to reach the highest corners of the loft. Everything a person could imagine for Christmas decorations I had in every shape and size, along with my own flare. Skulls, darker colors sprinkled in with the Christmas colors, fake snow, gothic-esque wreaths, nutcrackers everywhere, and even a mistletoe.

I even bought some Christmas blankets and pillows to toss around my couch.

When I got tired of the Hallmark Channel, I put onThe Greatest Showmanas I finished decorating. It had been Charlie and I’s favorite movie. We even learned the dance moves.

God, that seemed like a lifetime ago.

It took about thirty seconds into the opening number for me to start singing to the music. I did try and dance, but I was so out of shape, it was pointless, so I stuck with singing while I added finishing touches on the loft.

When the last song came on,The Greatest Show, I couldn’t help but give it every ounce of energy I had left. Something about it just resonated deep within me. I was happy today. I washappy.

No fears, no anger, only a slight bit of pain. I had spent the entire day, from the moment I got up until now, doing what I liked. Every thought I had had about Charlie had been just good memories, nothing tragic or sad, nothing horrible.

I felt good and it was relieving.

The last note was hard though, holding it for so long, but I did it. I belted it out, panting when I was done, laughing, smiling so wide, my cheeks hurt as my eyes fell to the giant ass tree now sitting, lit and decorated, in the far corner of the loft where the enormous windows on either wall met.

God, I felt good, and the loft lookedsogood.

I turned in a slow circle, taking in my finished place. It was so full of Christmas, Santa could have set up workshop here and—

I froze, my smile dropping.

Ash, Syn, and Grey were all standing near the elevator, holding food and drinks. Ash was smiling brightly, each pair of eyes shining.

My cheeks burned bright red, eyes widening. Fuck. How long had they been standing there. “No—”

Ash shoved her bags of food into Grey’s hands and laughed as she broke into a run, jumping straight into my arms. “That wasamazing, Emily!” she cheered, stepping back. “God, it was electric. I could feel it in my bones.”

I swallowed nervously, glancing to Syn.

She smiled, shrugging. “She’s right. You were amazing, and this place?” she breathed out, looking around as they made their way to the island. “You did amazing. I absolutely love it.”

I couldn’t even look at Grey. The last time we had seen each other, he had fucked me into a coma, and now he had seen me doing that? God, it was humiliating. “Thanks,” I mumbled. “H-how long…?”

“Literally the very beginning of the song,” Ash informed me, breaking away to admire all of the decorations.

“How did you even get up here?” I asked, straightening apillow just to straighten it.

“I took the spare,” Ash smiled. “Navarro did get irritated at that, but all is well now. Gotta wear it on a chain around my neck, which is fine, it goes with everything.” Her eyes lifted to the mistletoe hanging in the walkway behind the couch, her smile widening. “I still haven’t gotten details,” she finally said, giving me a look.

My eyes widened, I didn’t think my face could get any hotter. “I’m not…no. No, you will never get—I’m not talking about it.”

Ash nodded. “Right, right,” she winked.

Oh my God.

Syn gave Ash a look before turning to me. “We wanted to ask you if you were coming to the charity event this year,” she started, her eyes softening. “My parents wanted to know. You’re the only heir left, it’d be nice if you came.”

Ash walked over, joining her girlfriend against the island. “Please? It’d be great if you could come this year. I miss how much fun we had together. Don’t you remember the last time we all went?”

I did, and it felt like a lifetime ago. I couldn’t even remember being that person anymore.

My eyes shifted to Grey. He was leaning over the island on the far side, gripping the counter, his eyes steady on mine. Would he come if I asked him? Did I even want to go?

He lifted one brow, giving me such a miniscule shrug, I was sure even God would have missed it if he hadn’t been looking.

“We could dance together,” Ash suggested, pulling my eyes away. “You, me, and Syn. We could drink, have fun. We could rock the dance floor just like the old days.” Her eyes saddened, regret touching them. “Not like the old days, but good. It’ll be good. New memories. New adventures.”