Page 31 of Covington Acres
Vince turned the faucets off, dried quickly, then tugged his underwear on. He went straight for the door between their rooms, not taking the time to look at anything else. Just as he peeked in Colby’s, he heard, “Looking for me?” from behind him.
He smiled, turning to see Colby sitting on the edge of his bed, with wet hair and wearing a pair of shorts.
“I don’t want things to be awkward between us,” Colby said, looking down at the horrible dark-blue carpet.
Vince sighed, walked over, and sat beside him. The scent of the hotel soap was different from what Vince was used to on Colby’s skin. “I can’t help feeling I fucked up. You can’t even look at me. Is it because I’m a man? Or, because of where it happened? Fuck. I should have at least brought you back here first or given you time to be sure.”
Colby’s gaze snapped to his. “What? No. Wanting each other so much that we couldn’t wait was hot as fuck. It doesn’t matter how much good sex I’ve had in my life, I’ve never been thatfrantic for it. I’ve got a lot to sort through now, though. I guess that means I’m likely bisexual. I’m not freaking out, but it is new. Still, there’s no denying I wanted you…and it might have killed me if you’d made me wait for it.”
Vince chuckled, feeling some of the heaviness lift away from them. “Maybe you’re bi, maybe you’re pan. Maybe I’m just so fucking hot, you couldn’t help yourself,” he teased, and Colby nudged him with his arm. “In all seriousness, if you need an answer to that, you can do some research. Or you just identify how you want. There’s not one way to be queer, and if you have any questions, I’m always here, man.”
“Yeah, I know you are. It was…okay for you?” he asked quietly. “I came on pretty strong, and I would hate for you to have done that because you weren’t sure how to let me down easily or just because you felt you had to.”
Jesus. Leave it to Colby to have a moral code so wide, he somehow thought he had taken advantage of Vince. “I fucked around with you because I wanted you, want you. I’m attracted to you, babe. I’ve told you before I think you’re fucking hot. I’ve been attracted to you since the first moment I saw you, and it’s only grown as I’ve gotten to know you. I just don’t want to ruin what we have. We’re on the same page with the relationship thing, but I need to make sure you understand that it won’t change for me…even if it does for you.” Christ, he sounded like the biggest asshole in the fucking world. He couldn’t believe he’d said that to Colby, but he also thought it was important they put all their cards on the table. Holding anything in wouldn’t benefit either of them.
“No offense, Vince, but no way would I ruin the best thing that’s happened to me by trying to be in a relationship with you. I’ve lost other people I cared about because I couldn’t give them what they deserve. I can’t risk that with you.”
Vince couldn’t help wondering what the deal was with Colby and relationships. There didn’t have to be a reason, he supposed. Contrary to what most people believed, it was quite possible to simply not want a relationship, but it felt deeper with his friend.
“Well, that’s good because I can’t risk a relationship with you either.” They chuckled, and Colby yawned. “Lie down,” Vince told him, and the other man did so easily, pulling the blankets up and getting beneath them. Vince turned off the lights, other than the one beside the bed, and climbed in beside him.
He should talk to Colby about Gregory. Surprisingly, he was pretty sure hewantedto.
“Come’ere,” Vince said, and Colby settled in the crook of Vince’s arm. This wasn’t about sex, wasn’t about what happened earlier tonight, and somehow, he knew Colby felt the same. “My parents…when they died, it about killed me.”
Colby tensed beneath him. Vince didn’t talk about his parents much. He was fairly certain he hadn’t talked to Colby about them at all.
“They were great. My dad was the kind of dad who always wanted to be involved. He taught me sports and did homework with me. He treated my mom like a queen, and she treated him like a king, and they raised me to believe I would be a king one day too. Even when we struggled, they instilled hard work into me, made me believe there was nothing I couldn’t do. It doesn’t matter how young I was when I lost them. I am who I am because of them, and I still miss them every fucking day.”
Colby lifted a hand and rested it on Vince’s pec, brushing it with his thumb. “I’m so sorry. I hate that you lost them, but I’m so glad you have the memories you do. They sound incredible.”
“They were. But it was hard afterward. I was really fucking angry. I sure as shit didn’t ever want to feel the pain of losing someone I loved again. My aunt and uncle are great people, but they weren’t parents, not really. They never wanted kids and gotstuck with me. They never would have said that. They gave me everything I could have ever wanted. They would do anything for me, but we never really dug deep, ya know? Like we all had our own protections up. Maybeprotectionsisn’t the right word. Maybe that’s just who we are.”
Colby continued to touch him, playing with the hairs on his chest. This was surprisingly easy, sharing these things with Colby, letting him in this way.
“Anyway, I lived a great life. Accomplished a lot. I can’t say I avoided relationships, not really. I dated a lot, hooked up a lot, and there were people I was with that I cared about deeply. But I never fell in love until Gregory.”
Jesus, what was it about that man? Vince couldn’t say for sure. Just that Gregory had a way of making a person feel special, like they were the most important thing in the world, when really, the most important thing to Gregory would always be Gregory. He was a master manipulator who knew how to say the right things, and somehow that had hooked Vince.
“When I found out he cheated on me…well, first I was pissed, of course. And then I was hurt. I’d finally given myself to someone, found the person I wanted to be with, and they hadn’t felt the same. Maybe if his thing with Liam had been a one-off, it wouldn’t have been so bad, but they’d carried on a relationship for nearly a year before I caught them together. I had a meeting at a hotel, and I saw them there. As soon as I moved out, he moved Liam right in. It was like I hadn’t mattered to him at all, which had been a huge hit to my ego.
“I swore I would never do that again. I met Holden, we started hooking up, which turned into dating, but I knew it would never go anywhere. I love Holden, but I wasn’t in love with him. I couldn’t allow that to happen, and I knew he would never fall in love with me either, so it worked. We had fun together, but neither of us put pressure on the other for more.”
He stopped, not wanting to continue, afraid if he did, Colby would look at him differently for being so fucking dumb.
His arm was still wrapped around Colby, and Vince let his fingers dance up and down the man’s arm.
“I’m here if you want to continue, but don’t feel obligated to tell me if you’re not ready. I won’t push.”
Vince nodded and kissed the top of his head. “I’m making this sound like it’s a huge thing, when it’s not.” But it felt like that to him. “I was stupid and fell for Gregory again. He’s so damn good at being who you need him to be, at playing the victim, and I’ll never forgive myself for falling for it. Somehow, he had me believing that none of it had been his fault. That he was somehow the victim. I fell right back into his trap, and he was fucking someone else the whole time—again. Apparently, he’d been sleeping with this man since he was with Liam. In the end, he didn’t even try to hide it. I guess he was tired of me. I came home, and he’d packed my things. The guy was therewithhim. He just…told me to go and that he didn’t want me anymore.”
It was one of the lowest moments of Vince’s life. There had never been a time he’d felt like trash as intensely as he’d felt right then.
“Jesus, Vince. That guy sounds like a narcissist. Tell me you know it’s not your fault. That you did nothing wrong and he’s a piece of shit. Nothing that happened says anything bad about you.”
“Yeah, but I’m the one who fell for him again. The one who didn’t see how vile he is. Who was willing to change my life for a man who is that terrible. How did I fall for him? How did I not see it?”
“Because that’s what people like him do! They’re predators. He’s a manipulator, and you would never think something like that about a person because you’re not the type who would ever treat someone that way. Never.”