Page 53 of Mad Love
“It’s perfect, Weston. Even better than I imagined.”
“It will be once we get a crib.” We both laugh. “The stores are closing soon. Should we go pick one out tomorrow after coffee?”
“That would be great.” She smiles and nods. “Weston, Sasha would’ve—” She pauses. “She would’ve loved it, but actually, this is more my taste than Sasha’s.” She makes a face. “I don’t know why I feel bad saying that. We would’ve talked about it if she were here, so it’s not like I’m…talking behind her back.” She sighs and shakes her head. “I still don’t know how to talk about her like she’s not just away on vacation or something.”
“I get that. You can talk about her however you want,” I say. “I like hearing about her. I want Caleb to know everything about his mom.”
She takes a deep breath and her lips tilt up, and for the first time since I’ve known her, she doesn’t cry when she talks about Sasha. “She would have characters on the walls, and it would be cute, but I like how classy everything looks without them. Instead of that one adorable bunny that is the cutest,” she points to the floppy stuffed bunny propped up on the bookshelf, “there would be stuffed animalseverywhere. She liked things to be over the top, and I like that it’s still obviously a baby’s room without being hit over the head with cutesy everything.”
I smile. “I know what you mean. I like that about it too. We could add a few characters for Sasha if you want though.”
She laughs. “That’s sweet, but no, it’s okay. This is much better.” She looks at the picture of Sasha and Caleb. “And she’s still a part of things too.”
“My interior designer is Autumn Ledger—she’s the one who helped me find the rocking chair and almost everything else in this house. She’d call this understated elegance.”
She blinks up at me. “Did you say Autumn Ledger? Like Zac Ledger’s wife?”
I nod, grinning. “I know. I freaked when I met them. I was always a huge fan of Zac’s. He’s the true GOAT of the NFL, in my opinion. And he’s such a nice guy. There’s a weird connection with our families now—well, more like my sister’s family. Zac’s brother Jamison is married to my brother-in-law Sutton’s sister, Scarlett.”
She moves her fingers up like she’s calculating and then shakes her head. “Wow. So you’re saying Autumn Ledger has been in this house?”
I nod and she gives me a huge smile.
“That is amazing. Iloveher. I think I’ve seen every magazine and every show she’s ever been featured in…”
“You said you would’ve gone to school for interior design?”
“Yes. I don’t know that I’m any good at it, but I’m way into it.”
“Your apartment was decorated nice.”
She makes a face. “Thank you. That didn’t feel like my best effort, but I can make something out of very little.” She laughs. “My mom and Sasha both like a little more,” her lips twist as she tries to come up with the right word, “clutter…more knickknacks than me. I love the way you have a place for everything and it’s cozy without feeling cluttered.”
“I’d say thank you, but I have Autumn to thank for that.”
“I bet she asked what you liked and based everything around that, though,” she says. “So I’m sure you played a part in how it turned out. And I’ve been here long enough that I would’ve seen you make messes by now if that’s the way you kept your house.”
“She did grill me endlessly, trying to pinpoint what I like. And I loved everything she did so much that I haven’t wanted to screw it up.” I smile at her and then we both laugh when terrible sounds come out of Caleb.
She holds him up, scrunching her nose.
“I think it’s time to try out your new changing table, little guy,” she says.
It takes both of us to work on the mess the little dude has created, and when we’re done, we go downstairs and raid the fridge. There’s been a different vibe between us today, really since we went on that picnic together. I think I showed my hand too much when I told her she’s a rare kind of beautiful, but I stand by what I said. I get the impression that Sadie struggles with low self-esteem, or maybe it’s not that, maybe she’s just not been comfortable around me until now.
Since we’re talking more freely with one another now, I want to know everything about her. And that scares me. Because I don’t remember ever feeling this invested.
I keep telling myself it’s the situation we’re in.
It’s living in the same house.
Raising Caleb together.
She’s in a vulnerable state after losing her sister.
I’m in a vulnerable state finding out I had a son I didn’t know about…
All of it pointing toproceed with caution!