Page 26 of Not Until Her
I can’t read the tone on this piece of paper. It’s not even a piece of paper, it’s a purple sticky note. Surely this isn’t an attempt to start a conversation. Or apologize? I mean, it’s definitely not an apology, but…
I'm probably thinking about it a little too hard. She just didn’t know I had a kid. That’s all.
Ugh, there could be so many reasons she wrote that. How am I supposed to respond when I don’t know?
I have no choice but to sit on it. I’m too tired after the long day we had to figure it out.
9
Before I can blink, it’s Wednesday night again.
Caleb appears at my front door, and Dahlia runs to hug me like usual. I splatter kisses all over her face until she’s a giggling mess and has to push me away.
She says goodbye to her dad with a quick hug and a promise to see him in a few days, as if he doesn’t know that already.
“Can we chat?” Caleb asks once Dahlia goes running to her bedroom.
“What do you need?” I ask with a sigh. It’s never anything good. He seemed eager to have Dahlia for that extra night, but if he thinks he deserves something in return for stepping up as a dad? He has another thing coming. It’s been a lot less often recently, but things were rough when we first agreed to our custody schedule. Caleb had something come up every other week. I missed so much work. I depended on my parents for more than they should have had to give.
Which is why I’ll never understand how much they still love the guy.
He gestures to the chairs next to us.
“The last time you asked me to sit down, you wanted me to meet your girlfriend,” I say.
“I know you didn’t love that, and you’re probably not going to love this,” he admits.
Shit.
I sit down anyway, just willing this interaction to be over. I shouldn’t have to see him for more than a few seconds at a time.
“It’s a big ask,” he starts.
“Then don’t ask it.”
A cold wind attacks the space on my porch then, hitting my bare ankles with a sting. I wince, and mentally blame my ex-husband for the discomfort. I wouldn’t be out here if it weren’t for him.
“Do you want to go inside?”
“Alone, yes.”
He shakes his head, but just pulls up his sweatshirt to cover his neck. His shoulders stay lifted to keep it in place.
“You know how my brother lives in Manitoba?”
I slowly nod.
“Turns out Raquel also has family there. A couple of aunts that she hasn’t seen in a few years.”
“And?” I press.
“And we want to go visit them. Spend some time with family for the summer,” he explains.
I roll my eyes.
“So you need me to keep Dahlia for a couple weeks? Sure. Whatever. Text me the dates.”
I stand from my seat, but he reaches out to grab my arm. I flinch away from him, falling back into the chair. He could’veexpressed himself without putting his hands on me, but I shake it off.