Page 48 of Where We Fall

Before the conversation could go further, the limo stopped and the door opened. His eyes lingered on mine before he climbed out, and I tried not to get nervous when I heard the voices outside. But when I saw Dexter’s hand held out for mine, waiting for me to join him, I took a deep breath and stepped out. I wasn’t going to ever leave him alone again. No matter what.

We got inside and people greeted Dexter. When he introduced me, they all smiled warmly but I noticed they only ever offered a few words, as if this was the Dexter they knew. One who didn’t relish in small talk.

I smiled at him. “You don’t talk to these people?”

He shook his head with a grin. “Only about work.”

“Why?” I asked as I tilted my head.

“I don’t think they would care about what I say, and I know I wouldn’t care about what they say.”

“But you talk to me.”

He chuckled. “Is this your backwards way of asking if I care?”

When I only offered him my eyes, he stood, holding his hand out again. “Dance with me.” It was more command than question, but I still nodded.

To be in his arms in front of everyone here wasn’t something I’d say no to.

When he turned me into his embrace, I smiled. His one hand held mine and his other was against my spine, high enough to seem more friendly than anything.

“I’ve missed you,” I said, unable to hold the truth back any longer.

He didn’t say anything, just held me a fraction closer.

My eyes fluttered at the feel of his breath on my bare shoulder.

“I know what it’s like to pretend you aren’t the one. And I know what it’s like to know you’re the one and t\do nothing about it.” When he pressed his hand lower, on the small of my back, I jolted a bit, surprised by his touch.

Who were we?

Except deifiers of nature.

I love—no, Ilovedto love from afar. There’s a sweet pain in missing. A force that makes the yearning romantic. It’s bittersweet, wrapping your arms around a ghost.

Dexter was a ghost no longer. The warmth of his palm chased the thought away.

“You aren’t the only one,” I told him as I moved closer to him, until my chin hit his shoulder and his cheek pressed to mine. “We both know this is it.”

I could feel his cheek moving and I imagined what his smile would look like. Happy? Relieved?

“Remember when we went to dinner all those years ago? And you’d never been to a fancy restaurant before?” he asked, and I replied with a laugh. “You completely opened up to me. You told me everything, dumped your heart out on the table for me, and gave me an indescribable feeling. Where I wanted to just hold you in my arms and never let you go.”

“Then never let me go,” I said as I leaned back to look him in the eyes.

The song bled into another and Dexter made good on his word; he never let me go.

We were into the fourth song when the words bubbled from my lips. “My heart has gone cold without the fire.”

The spaces between our moments of contact were filled with drafty silence, despite my filling them with any type of superficial heat I could find. There was a part of me that would always be cold without him, barren and unable to move on.

“You can’t be cold, Blue. You’re the warmest color.” He stepped back and cupped my hands in his and kissed them, his beautiful eyes on mine. “Let’s get out of here.”

Though it was colder out, the late fall chill wrapping itself between the layers of my dress, I didn’t mind because Dexter held me close.

“Where are we going?” I asked, glancing up at the night sky.

Were our stars twinkling down on us?