Page 70 of Wild Heart

“I think I might have screwed up,” I confessed.

“How so?”

Shaking my head, feeling immense guilt, I admitted, “I’ve been so afraid to be myself around him ever since things went south between us. I mean, I’ve had some moments, mostly when I forget that I’m trying to be cautious, where I let myself go with him and things feel great between us. But mostly, I’ve been holding him at arm’s length.”

Skye didn’t hesitate to question me. “Why?”

“I’m terrified that if I allow myself to get comfortable, I’m going to lose him again. I don’t know. What happened between us shot my confidence, especially when it comes to the way I am about the two of us, and I just don’t want to risk going back to where we were for nearly a year and a half. I’ve never been so miserable in my life than I was when I didn’t have him in it.”

A heavy silence filled the room, and it was my best friend that finally broke it. “Do you think Tate is going to hurt you, or do something that would lead you both right back there?”

“No. At least, not intentionally. But I don’t want to lose him again.”

“That’s not possible, Ava. I don’t think you know just how bad it was for him when he realized you weren’t coming back.”

I winced, my throat growing painfully tight at the thought of how much pain I’d caused him.

“I’m not telling you that to upset you,” Ivy insisted. “I’m telling you because I think you need to understand just how much you mean to him. He was devastated. Crushed. He poured himself into work more than is normal for even him. It was like he was lost without having you here. I don’t think he’d ever risk the two of you winding up back there, and that’s why he’s doing all that he’s doing. As afraid as you are of losing him, I think Tate is just as terrified he’ll lose you, too.”

My heart ached.

I’d been so selfish, thinking only about myself and the way my life had been impacted by this whole situation. Tate had taken the time to share some details with me on both Christmas Day and earlier this week during that board game, but either I wasn’t truly paying attention, or I never imagined just how bad things must have been for him.

God, I’d screwed up.

I needed to love on this man.

I needed to do something to prove to him that I was a woman worth the effort he was putting in.

“Uh oh.” That came from Rhea.

“What?” Skye asked.

“I don’t think Ava is a woman scorned any longer. I think she’s a woman on a mission. I’m pretty sure she’s a woman who just realized how much the man she loves is into her, and she’s not interested in wasting another second.”

I stood from the bed, crossed the room, and put on my shoes. “We need to go. I’m ready to dance tonight.”

Four gorgeous faces smiled back at me, and Jules was the first to hop off the bed. Then we were heading down the stairs to meet up with the guys.

As it turned out, Keystone Mountain Ski Resort wasn’t just a great place to partake in winter sports. There was also an incredible nightlife for anyone looking to keep the fun going.And they’d had a great spot right on the mountain where guests could grab drinks and food as well as listen to music, dance, see the occasional live band, or simply enjoy a fun vibe after a day on the slopes.

It was our last night here, so we’d indulged ourselves with some last-minute fun. And now that I’d had an awakening of sorts when it came to what was happening between Tate and me, I had a feeling this was going to be a night to remember.

I’d go out and dance with the women tonight—the guys were coming along, too—but when we got back to our chalet and everyone tucked in for the night, I was going to sneak into Tate’s room and tell him how much I appreciated all that he was doing for me, for us.

When we’d made it downstairs, where the guys were waiting patiently for us, I watched as Tate’s eyes roamed appreciatively over my body. He liked what he saw, and I had to hand it to him.

Despite whatever he had been feeling over the last few days, no matter how much he might have wanted to act on those physical desires, he’d respected my wishes. How could I not want to show him how much it meant to me, how much he meant to me?

The ten of us left—Larry, Wendy, Malcolm, and Evelyn, opting for a quieter night in with Mina and her husband—while Mina’s children were going to be meeting up with us for some fun.

As soon as we stepped inside and heard the music, I was already itching to move my body. The rest of the women were eager as well, so we didn’t waste any time. We took off, leaving the guys behind to hang at the bar or to find their own table somewhere. We’d catch up with them later.

For the next little while, I danced to my heart’s content. Maybe it was the realization that occurred before we left that chalet, but I was the happiest I’d been in a very long time.Eventually, we opted to take a quick break to rehydrate. We made our way over to the bar, and I glanced around the nearby area, searching for any sign of the guys. My gaze settled on a couple of high-top tables not far from where I was standing. Tate was with his brothers, Marco, and his cousins. There had been a few women hanging around, but most of them were hovering closer to Tate’s cousins. I figured it had to do with people recognizing they were the equivalent of royalty in Scarlet Valley, and many people saw them the way others saw the Westwoods in Landing.

No sooner did I have some water in my hand, a smooth voice filtered into my ear. “Having fun?”

I twisted my neck and looked up at Tate, beaming at him. “The best. Then again, I have a feeling you already knew the answer to that question.”