Page 81 of Her Pretty Words
He kisses me then. My eyes fall shut and stars burst behind my eyelids. We get lost in each other, both of us breathless. “You make it better,” he says into the next kiss. “You make me feel like I’m alive.”
He makesmefeel like I’m alive.
My body moves naturally against his, and I canfeeljust how alive he is. Veiled beneath the midnight sky, tucked under the lifeguard tower, it feels like our own separate world. I pull back to observe him in the dark. He always looks sharp around the edges when he’s adorned in shadows. As if he can’t stand the absence of my lips any longer, his face angles up to mine and he kisses me like he’s starved. He tightens his grip on my hips, pushing and pulling me forward to create wonderful friction.
His hands slide toward my backside, squeezing me as he lets out a long groan. I pull down the waistband of his underwearand joggers, springing him free. His wide eyes meet mine with a mixture of shocked amusement. My shorts are loose enough for me to pull my underwear aside, and when I do, Grayson stills me. “I don’t have a condom on me.”
“I have an IUD.”
He blows out a steady breath as I lower myself onto him. I move my hips with every ounce of love I have for him and with every year that has tried to separate us. My mind always returned to the memory of him, winning the test of time. And then I kiss him with every promise I have to make the future a place so beautiful that his mind doesn’t want to return to the past. At least not the sad parts.
When it’s over, I don’t slide off him yet. We cling to each other for a while, with the wind’s whisper against our skin. The nighttime sky hanging over us like a secret. He kisses my shoulder, then rubs his chin over the skin. I hiss from the scrape of his stubble. He kisses it again and whispers an apology.
A month ago, I was living in a place I longed to leave, engaged to a man I despised. I picture being stuck in a cave, with fallen boulders blocking the way I came. Trying to move the dozens of rocks with bloodied fingernails and shouted pleas. I envision dust coating my lungs and every ounce of strength being wasted on attempting to escape. That was my life, and then, I turned around and found a sliver of light, and it grew the more I followed it. It led me out. It led mehere. To Daniel. To Grayson. To the dreams I never dared to hope for.
Sometimes the way out isn’t the obvious path. Sometimes it’s a faint sliver of light that you need to follow. Sometimes, that light leads you right where fate wants you to be.
Chapter 31
Grayson
My mom’s car is in a million pieces. Delilah is somewhere in the mess, bloodied and sleeping. I scream her name while I rush to her, but the moment my grown-up hand touches her small one, her face morphs into someone else.
Long brunette hair and unseeing brown eyes.Macy.
The world shrinks around me, and I realize it’s the hole in my chest, vacuuming every corner of pain that crowds the planet. It drowns my lungs until I’m screaming from the pit of my chest.
“Grayson,” a sad voice whispers. “It’s just a dream. Open your eyes.” I do, and staring down at me are brown eyes with flecks of gold. Veryaliveones, on a veryalivegirl. My throat burns like I’ve been screaming, my skin slick with sweat. I pull Macy to my chest and hug her tight to me. After what we did beneath the lifeguard tower, I insisted she spend the night with me, not expecting it to go this way.
I haven’t had the nightmare since I was a teenager. It was always the same dream. An endless torment from my own mind, showing me what happened that day. But now it’s changed. Now, Macy takes Delilah’s place.
“Do you want to talk about it?” she whispers. My heart races beneath her ear, and she grabs my hand and interlocks our fingers. She places a gentle kiss to my sternum. I like when she peppers soft kisses on my skin.
“No.” I sigh. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize.”
“You’re right. Sorry.”
She shoots me a pointed look.
I chuckle. “I really do love when you look at me like that.”
“Go to sleep.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
I shoot up the moment my hand reaches for her body and meets the unoccupied side of my bed.
“Macy!” My voice trembles with fright.
“Yes?” she walks through my open bedroom door with damp hair and a towel wrapped around her.
My entire body seems to sigh with relief. My heart races, and my hands shake but I set them down so she can’t see. “Nothing. I thought you…”Died. “Went home.”
She grins. “You would miss me if I did?”
I roll my eyes. “If I hadn’t made it clear already, let me elaborate. My mind has a hard time focusing on anything other than the thought of you. So yes, Mace, I’d miss you.”