Page 12 of Loving Jamie

I press a kiss to his lips. “Don’t thank me. We’re all in this together. Jamie was triggered by seeing the sub being whipped on stage. He says that’s what his arsehole ex used to use on him.” He takes a deep breath and I kiss him on the lips again. “Don't worry, he’s safe with us, but I don't think that’s even the worst of it.”

I get into my own car and when William starts to drive, I follow behind him.

My mind is buzzing with all the things we need to talk about. William still isn't sure of his place in this relationship with us. He was hesitant to come over when he noticed Jamie was upset.

I figured Jamie’s ex was a dickhead, but I didn’t think it was this bad. Thinking back to a few hours ago when Jamie let me get him dressed, I did notice a few welt marks on his back, but I thought they were simple stretch marks.

Now I think about it… I haven't seen Jamie fully nude. I mean, we have slept in the same bed naked, but that was always when the lights were low so I couldn’t see every part of his body clearly.

My jaw hurts from how tightly I'm clenching my teeth. How dare someone think they have the right to hurt Jamie, to scar his body?

We pull up to William’s home ten minutes later, a modern brown brick semi-detached house. Jamie and William haven't gotten out of the car yet, so I give them a few minutes alone. When William gets out of the car and opens the passenger side door for Jamie, I then get out and join them.

William unlocks the front door first and allows us to enter first. We walk into an open-plan kitchen and living room. The house is decorated nicely with warm earth tones. I walk over to a dark brown leather sofa and pull Jamie along with me. William grabs some drinks and joins us a few moments later.

I’m the first one to speak when I ask, “Do you want to talk about it?”

Jamie’s eyes lock onto mine as he nods his head. “Yeah, I suppose I should. I don’t know why it freaked me out so much. I mean, I have seen plenty of people being whipped before and it doesn’t usually freak me out like that.”

His hands are shaking as he leans forward to grab his drink. After a few sips, he places it back on the table and begins to say “I was with my ex-boyfriend, Damian, for about two years. When my parents kicked me out, I moved into the flat that I still live in today. It was a shit hole at first, but that didn’t matter because it was my own space. After settling into my new apartment, I went to a bar one night when I was feeling down and that’s where I met Damian. We had a few drinks and got on well. I thought he was such a gentleman. He helped me get home when I was drunk and declined my invitation to spend the night.”

William stands up and walks towards us. He sits on the coffee table that’s in front of the sofa we are sitting on. He takes Jamie’s hand in his and says, “If you don’t want to tell us more, you don’t have to. I can see that it is obviously hard for you to talk about.”

Jamie looks up at him, a sad smile on his face. “I know, and I appreciate that, but I need to tell you guys. If we want this relationship to work, I want you both to know everything about me.”

Chapter 9 –

Jamie

William squeezes my hand tightly for a moment and then relaxes his grip but keeps hold of me, Justin places his hand on the back of my neck and rubs the tight muscles. The skin-to-skin contact is comforting.

I take a few deep breaths and continue to say, “So yeah, together for two years, he takes me home that first night but doesn’t come inside. We exchanged phone numbers, and we went out on a few dates. Things seemed to be going well for the first few weeks and he introduced me to the kink lifestyle. I wasn’t inexperienced when it came to sex, I had messed around with a few people before I met him and I had some understanding of what I liked in the bedroom but it felt like I was discovering something magical when he explained BDSM to me and the different types of relationships people had. He told me he was a Dom, and he had been for over ten years.”

I feel both of their eyes on me when I say that, considering the fact I was 18, they probably thought he was around the same age as me.

William speaks first and says, “Wait a minute, how old was Damian when you met?”

“He was 36 years old when we got together.”

They both look shocked when I say this and I completely understand an 18-year difference is bad. I'm 25 now and when I look at 18-year-olds, I couldn’t imagine wanting anything sexual from them.

I'm quick to add, “I know it looks bad and you're right it was bad, I had just turned 18 and at the time he told me I was mature for my age but this was a fully grown man and I was barely a legal adult.”

Justin says, “God Jamie, I'm so sorry. You were going through a lot with being kicked out by your family, and that man took advantage of you.”

I nod my head because I know what he is saying is correct, but it doesn’t make me feel any less stupid.

My eyes fill with tears, but I refuse to let them escape. “I know, trust me, I know. Everything was fucked up, but he was so nice and understanding at first that I thought the age difference didn’t matter.”

William wipes his fingers across my cheek and when he pulls his fingers away, I see them wet from my tears. “We aren't blaming you Jamie, anything that happened wasn’t your fault. Yeah, you may have agreed to be in that relationship, but at the end of the day, he was a fully grown man. He should have known better.”

I nod my head and sniff away the tears. Justin kisses my cheek and asks, “Do you want to continue, or shall we stop?”

Shaking my head, I say, “No, I don’t want to stop. I need to get it all out now.”

They both smile at me but don’t speak so I continue my story. “Anyway, he explained some stuff to me and he told me that he thought he could make me into the perfect sub. I didn’t truly understand what he meant but I trusted him so I agreed to try some things. The first thing he taught me was some submissive positions, you know just the basic things likeinspection,attentionandkneelingposes and I liked them. But when he used to make me hold positions for a long period and I couldn’t do it he would punish me.”

William’s eyes are squinted as he says, “Punish you how?”