Page 16 of Hockey Boy
War shrugs. “Everyone was settling down. Two of your brothers got married and had kids.”
I snag another beer from the fridge and pop the top. “Gavin isn’t married.”
Setting his beer on the quartz counter with athunk, War glowers.
“Okay, fine, he’s practically married. Still, they’re a whole freaking decade older than us.”
He kicks one leg over the other, crossing them at the ankles. “Brooks will be next.”
Can’t really argue that. And he’s probably dreaming of the day he can knock Sara up.
“And you,” he adds.
“Are no longer getting married.” I hold up my ring finger to emphasize the point. Though I guess men don’t wear engagement rings. Why we don’t, though, I have no idea. If I had been with the right girl, I’d totally have wanted to wear a ring.
Lennox’s sparkling blue eyes haunt me. The softness in her expression when she looked at me this afternoon. The wistfulness of her voice as she described the perfect wedding.Ourperfect wedding.
She could tell me the scenario is one she planned for Jill till she was blue in the face, but I knew without a doubt that when she was describing her vision, she saw me standing at the altar, but she was the one walking down the aisle.
It’s the same thing I saw.
My dreams have never included Jill. She was a reality I settled for because, for years, I’ve believed that there was no way Lennox ever would be.
War’s dark laughter brings me back to the present. “Yeah, you’ll be married by the end of the year.”
I shudder. “Fuck no. Did you not hear me last night? Jill sucks.” I take a long pull from my beer.
War’s normally icy-blue irises warm. “Not to her. To Lennox.”
I roll my neck, pushing away the hope that is probably lighting up my face. “Yeah, no. We’ve barely spoken in ten years. Definitely not getting married anytime soon.”
Pointing a finger and circling it in the air, War laughs. “See? You can’t even deny that you want it. Anytime soon, eh?”
I keep my face straight. Neutral. I can be cool.I am cool.Cool as a cucumber.
“You all right?” he asks, studying me. Apparently, I am not cool as a cucumber.
“I’m fine.” I take a sip of my beer. Of course I’m not fine. I didn’t want to wake up this morning. I lay on my back in bed for far too long, willing myself out of bed. Wondering whether anyone would truly miss me if I didn’t. Then I remembered I make them all smile, so yeah, they’d probably miss me. That’s what I’m good for.
I smile now to show just how very fine I am. “So Cambridge, eh?”
War drops his focus to the floor, and suddenly, I’m not the one hiding something. “Yeah, Cambridge.”
“There a girl?”
He scoffs, grabs his beer, fiddles withthe label. “A girl?”
“Yeah, a woman who made you want to find a place in a good school district. Near a safe park, all that stuff.”
War pushes off the counter and stalks toward the bedroom. “Here, I’ll show you the bedroom.”
“Oh, there is so totally a girl,” I say, jogging after him.
The door to War’s apartment flies open, and Brooks walks in like a man on a mission. “Why did Lennox just walk into my apartment to tell me she spent the day planning your wedding?”
“Nohi how are you? No knock to signal your arrival before you barge in? What happened to your manners? I know you’ve got them.” I fold my arms across my chest, ignoring the way my heart is galloping at the knowledge that Lennox is in this building right now, talking about our afternoon.
Behind me, War laughs. “It’s your apartment now, Leprechaun.”